Life is Beautiful

a scare

2012-02-22T19:56:00.000-08:00

What a morning we've had! Our Kason has given me a huge scare and I'm still not quite over it. It was going to be a nice mellow morning because my nieces didn't come today so it was just Kason and little Carson until Anika got done with her preschool. I was cleaning up the kitchen, taking my time and was enjoying the chippery sounds from the boys. I just thought to myself how thankful I was that they were playing so nice together, even if Carson is only 18 months old. Then I started to look through some bills quick when somehow I felt a strange feeling that it is way too quiet which is never a good thing with the kids.

I went over to the living room and that is when my "nightmare" began. I saw the empty pills bottle sitting on our side table and I knew right away. I asked Kason all the questions at once: "Did you eat these? Where are the pills, Kason? What happened? Did you eat them?" The bottle with about 60 pills of Fluoride supplements was empty and I couldn't find one pill laying around anywhere. It was all my fault, just the thought that I was the one who left the bottle there the night before after the kids went to bed made me feel sick to my stomach. I started looking all over Kason and trying to see if he was ok. He seemed perfectly fine but he started getting afraid after he saw my expressions. At first he was just scared he was in trouble but then he got really scared seeing me in the panic mode. I called Ehren while I was looking up everything about Fluoride over dozing and he left work right away. Then I called the ER but they had me on hold for so long I got my cell phone out and dialed the poison control at the same time and luckily they talked to me right away. The lady made me feel so much better, she said the doze should not be threatening to him and it will just give him a really bad stomach ache. She said to give him as much dairy products as I can because Calcium would absorb the Fluoride. As I hung up the phone with the lady Kason started telling me his stomach really hurts. I made him a big glass of chocolate milk right away and by then Ehren got home from work. As Kason was almost done drinking it, he started coughing and threw up all over the kitchen floor. I don't think either Ehren or me were ever so happy to see a throw-up. :) It was all purple because the pills he took were tinted purple with grape flavor. I was still not sure, how can you tell how much of the pills he ate he actually threw up, but it for sure made me feel way better to see some out of his body. He still had stomach ache for a couple hours or so after that and laid on the couch for a while. He also had 2 more cups of chocolate milk and 2 yogurts and I thought that should be plenty of dairy for Kason's little body. After all that he had to go to the bathroom and I was glad he's able to go and things were moving inside of him. He also seemed to feel a lot better soon after that and after Anika came home from school you wouldn't know anything has happened.

It seems so unreal that it just happened today. I feel so bad for leaving it out like that, such a careless thing to do. But at the same time, I could not be more thankful and full of praise to God that it was such a minor thing. I am in the middle of my second book about a child being in Heaven (the boy that went to Heaven) and it really makes you think about losing your child or what it would feel like if you had to face that. It sure makes Heaven more real and closer than ever and I've been trying to talk to the kids more about it. Just the other day Kason decided he didn't want to die because he didn't want to go to Heaven without me and got a bit upset about having to go by himself if something happened to him. And I think for a second this morning when I was panicking and telling him he could have gotten really hurt he got really afraid that something would happen to him. So we prayed together for God to heal his little body and stomach and just like that, Kason was good to go and wasn't upset about it anymore. That's faith like a child. I am so happy this day didn't turn into a real nightmare and it was just a good reminder for me to be more careful. God is good and He takes care of us.

teachers

2012-02-21T06:38:00.000-08:00

In Slovakia, we had the same teacher for a long time in elementary school. At least for the first 4 grades I think it was the same teacher. Here, Kade has had a different teacher every year. And I have to say, they were all wonderful teachers, until this year. :) Not that she's bad or mean or anything like that, she just doesn't seem to drive the kids and push them to their limits. We meet with the teachers twice a year and the first time we met with her it was still the beginning of the year and I wasn't sure what to really think. This time, we just met with her last night, I was able to form a better opinion and I have to say I'm a bit disappointed. Not that she is not doing her job, just her attitude towards the class. I get it, she has mostly boys who are a bit immature (including Kade) because they are months younger than the rest so she has to deal with a lot of that but overall the class is doing exceptionally well academically but it doesn't seem to make much of a difference to her. Our meeting with her wasn't very long but we spent most of the time talking about Kade either misbehaving with the other boys or him tattle telling on others. We do recognize it as his weak point right now because he does that a lot at home but we're trying to deal with it. He's very much concerned with everyone around him and if they are not following the rules he'll be the first one to point it out. In a way, I think it is a good character trait to have for when he grows up but on the other hand I try to explain to him how nobody likes being told on by someone and especially teachers do not like it. I'm not sure how to get it through to him because it seems like every day I have to talk to him about it over and over.

Anyway, that is a pretty minor thing because he is very responsible to do all his work and always stays on task at school. He is also very competitive and tries so hard to improve his score if someone is ahead of him, which is really great. One thing that bugs me about his teacher though is that she barely even mentioned anything about how well he's doing with math and reading. She's just like a matter of fact, "you know he passed all the math levels so that's great." I'm thinking that's all you have to say? He worked so hard to finish all the levels and she barely acknowledges that. Their goal really is for all the kids in the class to finish the levels by the end of the school year. He worked and worked on it and he was the first one in his class by like a month to finish all the levels. In my mind, that speaks for something and I was so proud of him when he did that. But I guess that doesn't mean that much to his teacher because he's the tattle tell. :)

I know, I can't complain because kids nowadays have it so easy as far as teachers go. They're all so nice to the kids, they can't ever go after a misbehaving child or else they would hear back from the upset parents right away. So Kade doesn't have it hard by any means, but I can tell a huge difference from 2nd to 3rd grade. He loved his teacher before and was so close to her and wanted to please her so bad but it's not there with his teacher this year. In a way, I think he wants to win her approval so bad but that won't happen. And it's ok. That is life and I know God can use the not such good experiences for our good. People are not going to be nice to us everywhere we go and it is good for Kade to see that. And our job is to be the light for those that live in the darkness. We can't be that light when all we do is stay in our safe homes and safe churches and only spend time with our good Christian friends. I hope Kade can get stronger and learn from the hard times he has sometimes in school, whether it's with bullies, mean kids or teachers that favor other kids. And I pray I have the wisdom to teach him and steer him in the right direction and to just be there for him and be available whenever he needs me. Because in the end, Ehren and I are his first and most important teachers and we need to be the ones teaching him right from wrong.

fresh air

2012-02-20T06:33:00.000-08:00

I don't know what it is about fresh air and how it can rejuvenate you right away. I am one of those people who need their outside physical activity and if it's too long without being able to go it really wears on me. And this weekend we've had the most gorgeous weather so I was able to be outside again. I really can't think of another winter since we moved up here that was this nice. I may actually start liking it here if we have more winters like this. :)

I have been trying to get over a cold this week that won't leave me. At first I would have cold symptoms one day and the next they would be gone, other than feeling wiped out. But then the cold came to stay with me and it's been about 5 days now. Never mind that I am trying to get into so-so running state so I can at least run without stopping at the Fargo 1/2 Marathon. My sister-in-law Jessica signed up for a race first and then Ingrid and I signed up together so now it's official and I HAVE to start running because the race is in May. I did it kind of to force myself to start running sooner than I would otherwise and also to hopefully get a better result by my second half marathon that I like to run in October. So far my running has been very up and down. I'd have a good week and then me or someone else gets sick and so it goes, always interrupted workout time. On Sunday morning I woke up, still feeling very stuffed up and coughing but I was determined to use this beautiful day and go running in the afternoon. Well, the afternoon came and I could tell there's no way my body would enjoy running already feeling weak enough but I didn't want to lose such a beautiful day. And so the only obvious choice was - a long brisk walk. I haven't done that forever because if I go walking by myself I might as well run. :) I do love long walks, especially with good friends so we can chat away while we walk but it's not easy to sync our busy schedules and come up with a good time. So I just run by myself, with my mp3 player instead. But today I walked instead and I couldn't even use my mp3 player because the batteries went dead but after a little while, I was really enjoying my walk. It was the perfect temperature, a slight breeze would hit my face and I just enjoyed the fresh air and quiet Sunday streets. I am so glad I decided to go outside instead of trying to take a nap. It cleared my head, I got some much needed alone time and it felt great.

It made me think of when I was working in the Cities and I had a dedicated walking buddy and a great friend Marcia who I would walk with every lunch break. I miss those walking lunch breaks so much, still after 5 1/2 years. I gave up trying to find that someone to go walking with me here in TRF but maybe some day I will find that person again. :) It is a bit sad too when we get these beautiful days because in a way it makes me too eager for Spring, but Spring is still 2-3 months away. But I'm really thankful for the beautiful weather I had today and for the time I got to enjoy some fresh air. I hope we get many more days like that.

ice skating

2012-02-19T17:58:00.000-08:00

Anika

A couple weekends ago an exciting thing happend - Ani started skating on her own! It was a huge thing for her and she was so proud. We didn't have our camera then so we went this weekend again so she could show dad how she can skate because he missed it. It is not exactly skating, more like walking on ice :) but that's ok, it is the beginning anyway. I just had to post something because I am so proud of our Ani. Ever since she was about 18 months old she's had a harder time with some physical activities than other kids. She walked at 12 months but as a toddler she had a harder time with things like walking up and down the stairs, jumping, throwing balls, walking on a straight line and so on. She even had a few months of physical therapy which really didn't do much because I felt like they weren't doing anything we didn't already do every day. At the end the therapist said she's still a little bit behind her age yet she doesn't qualify for therapy anymore. So we've been just encouraging her in anything she found interest in. And it's not at all like she has a handicap and we don't ever talk about her as if something was wrong with her because there's nothing wrong. Some kids are just not that coordinated or physically gifted and that's ok. I'm ok with her not being a fast runner or never being picked for a good sports team, but I want to encourage her as she learns new things and support her when she decides she'd like to try something new (well, within reason of course :)).

Anika always loved the thought of ice skating and last year she was very scared to try it on her own but this year we only did it a few times and she slowly got braver and braver and now she doesn't want to hold my hand anymore. She says "I want to skate by myself" :). It really makes me happy to see her getting braver at things and really try hard to do what other kids around her are doing. She reminds me of myself when I was little and I would try so hard to do anything my brothers were doing. She sometimes watches the kids for a while but then when noone is watching she will try and try and not give up until she gets it and that's what I love about her. It can be hard sometimes when I want to show her how to do something and she won't let me because if she can't do it by herself she doesn't want to do it. But in the end, it doesn't matter at all what sports she masters or knows how to do. What matters is if I am there to encourage her and cheer her on and to show her how proud I am of her.

trying to play hockey with Kade :)

Kason is not liking the skates that much but they are a bit small. We'll wait for next year to really work on it.

Valentine's Day

2012-02-15T07:29:00.000-08:00

Ehren and I don't usually do anything special for valentine's day and that's just fine but somehow over the last few years I really try to make it a fun day for the kids. They get so excited about making valentines for everyone and having a party at school and home. We worked hard on valentines a few days before. Emily, Ani and Kason loved making new hearts for everyone they love. Since we've had daycare kids at our house we have done a little Valentine's party instead of our usual snack time and it's usually a big hit with all the kids so we couldn't skip it this year. We had peanut butter jelly sandwiches shaped like hearts, fruit, sparkling juice and some treats. And oh my for the treats! I did not realize how much crap kids bring home from school on Valentine's Day because all the classmates give some candy to everyone. It is going to last them a long time unless I throw some in the garbage :). It was just a really nice day. We had our playgroup friends come in the morning and for lunch and it's always fun visiting with them. Then Ehren's mom came to see the kids during our Valentine's snack and after Ehren got home we went to visit his great aunt Judith at the nursing home. She was really happy to see us and the kids. She is getting weaker and more fragile every time we see her but she always has a smile on her face and is delighted to talk to us and see what's new with us.

So it was a fun day for sure. I was also dead tired by 8:30pm :) but it was so worth it. It is really strange but both Ehren and I have been feeling such peace in our home lately. We just feel blessed beyond words and feel like we don't deserve it. I am a true pessimist and part of me is waiting for something bad to happen which I know sounds terrible but it's how I'm wired. So I try to savor these moments and really enjoy the blessings from God. Our 3 beautiful, smart and healthy kids, our awesome house, Ehren's job and his recent promotion to a supervisor, our health, and everything else that we don't deserve. With all the suffering, financial and health-wise, broken homes we see all around us I feel a bit guilty for being so blessed. And I just hope Ehren and I can be good stewards of it all, be God's hands and feet where we are and not just live our safe little life with our family. It is so easy to just focus on our family and making sure we're there for each other and are taken care of when there are people all around us that are hurting and have no one that's there for them. And in the big scheme of things, our little lives are so insignificant which really helps me see what is important in this short life we have here. Have a blessed day wherever you are!

And in the light of Valentine's Day I have to end with a little thought about my Kason. He has always been a little bit of a mommy's boy, liked to cuddle with me and sleep right next to me as a baby. But recently, he is becoming very affectionate with me and it is the cutest thing. He hugs me at least 20 times a day, kisses me on the cheek and tells me :"I love you mommy" or sometimes "lubim ta" in Slovak. I try to cherish every one of those moments because with Kade I see how quickly they grow up and are a lot less eager to hugs and kisses. I am also a very non-affectionate person as Ehren would tell you :) but with Kason, we have a special bond that way and I still hold him in my arms a few times a day. And I love it. Party it could be that he's my baby, he's our last one and I am holding on to him as long as I can. :) But I will always treasure the way he tells me he loves me over and over every day. :)

working hard on the puffy hearts

bean heart with a magnet to put on the fridge

pbj hearts

cake treats I made

nana handing out her Valentine cards

"tragedy" turns into a fun evening

2012-02-08T06:56:00.000-08:00

Kade has been playing basketball this past winter. At first he didn't want to sign up so I really encouraged him to do it because after all, through the whole winter that is the only sport he can do at school. Hockey is huge here and I know he'd be good at it, but we decided to not even start going down that road as we see some "hockey families" and how from November until March their life is all about hockey and we don't want that for our family. So anyway, Kade has been having fun this winter with basketball and getting a little better than last year. After the regular season is over they have so called "traveling teams" that continue practicing twice a week and then have some tournaments against other towns. Somehow I assumed only the 4th graders and up get in the traveling teams until a friend of mine goes: "Congratulations, I saw Kade made the traveling team". I was glad she told me because I would have no idea and Kade would probably end up getting bumped from the team. Honestly, I thought even if there was a traveling team Kade wouldn't get picked because there were so many boys in basketball and they only picked 10. But I guess he was good enough and he was so excited about it. I'm just glad he gets to practice more so he will be able to get better. They have 2 hour-and-a-half long practices every week which is great. And since he's only in 3rd grade they only play in one tournament along with 4 other towns which I love because we don't have to spend many Saturdays traveling to different tournaments like the older grades do.

Anyway, that is my intro to our story last night. Right around 5pm as the daycare kids were about to leave for home we had an accident. The boys were downstairs in the basement, being boys and being a bit wild. They like to go as fast as they can on little scooters and things and I'm surprised nothing ever happened. Until last night. All of a sudden I just hear a big cry from Kade, him holding his head and running upstairs. Something about Kason running into his head with the bicycle while Kade was looking the other way. My first reaction was he's being a little drama queen so I made him lie down for a bit. He calmed down and came back to the kitchen saying his head really hurt so I had him put some frozen vegetable bag on it. As he's doing it he noticed there's blood on it and right away I felt terrible for not checking it right away. It was a tiny cut on the back of his head but it was bleeding pretty good. We washed it and he held something on it and I thought it would be fine, but little while later it was bleeding again. And so, I told him he had to miss the basketball practice that night because if he hit it again it might bleed even more. And he started really crying then because he really didn't want to miss the basketball. I was planning on taking Kason and Ani to the library after I dropped Kade off so I asked him if he wanted to come with us to the library. Kade was quiet and then he goes in all seriousness: "But what if a book falls on my head?" :) I had to laugh out loud at his comment which he did not appreciate but I told him he was just funny and I wasn't laughing at him.

But he was still upset about not going to basketball so I got an idea to cheer him up. He got a Dairy Queen (ice cream place) certificate from someone a long time ago that he's been wanting to use and there was never a good time to go but I thought that would really cheer him up right now. Ehren was working late so I let him know to come and meet us at DQ after we're done at the library. And so we had our little family ice cream time together and it was great. Even though as we sat down I told Ehren we must be crazy for going out for ice cream when it's like 10 below F but that is what people in Northern MN do I guess. I don't even like ice cream that much so that is definitely not a treat for me, but seeing the kids get all excited to go to DQ was fun. It doesn't take much sometime to make memories for the kids and they remember those times so well when we took the time to do something special for them. I'm so glad I thought of it because seems like in our busyness we don't have enough of those times when it's just our family spending time together. And it worked out great too because it was our "Tuesday family night" which we were going to move to Thursday because of Kade's basketball but it turned out we had a great family Tuesday after all. And none of it would happen if Kade didn't get hurt. :)

warm winter

2012-02-06T12:47:00.000-08:00

Winter is here and we've been having warmer weather than ever. There were only a few really cold days but then the temps come back up which is so nice and we've been trying to enjoy it as much as we can. I love this weather (around freezing) for running outside, but I haven't been able to go at all because early in the morning or after dinner it's too dark for me to go. I wish I could take a lunch break and just go run outside for a bit.

This last weekend we went to Ingrid's house to celebrate Clare's 4th birthday and we had a good time. The cousins have so much fun when they get together, they're really cute. After the cake and presents we headed across the street for some sledding. Even though there wasn't a ton of snow, it worked great and their little but steep hill was a bit faster than what we're used to from TRF. :) So Anika was really scared to go down and Kason had a couple bad wipe-outs which he did not like at all. Towards the end we were finally able to get Ani to go down a few times and she did enjoy it. Kade was trying to stand on his sled as if snowboarding which makes me think he would enjoy skiing or snowboarding. It's too bad we're so far from the real mountains but I plan to take him at least to our tiny ski area. Even that costs a lot of money and if all of us wanted to go skiing there we'd pay about $130 for one day. I don't want to know how much we'd pay at a nice ski area in the mountains. Even so, skiing is such a great sport and I hope to at least introduce our kids to it a little. I've been discovering cross country skiing now since we live on the flattest land there is and I really enjoy it. Sadly, we haven't had enough snow for me to go yet around our house so I hope it will still turn around and I'll be able to ski some on weekends. Last year I finally bought all the equipment I need for it so I've been anxiously waiting for some good snow fall to get out there. But, I am not too pessimistic about this winter yet because our winters and snow usually last until April so it has to come sometime. :) It is funny how in Slovakia and many places in Europe right now have very cold temperatures and more snow than usual because it's like they stole it from us. We're the ones always too cold with too much snow but I'm not complaining one bit. :)

Here's a few pictures and videos from this last week. One video shows Kason crashing and even though it doesn't look very bad, he had a good scratch on his face from it.

by our house - we had a few days of a lot of fog so we would
wake up to frost all over the trees.

all the cousins

Clare is 4!

singing "happy birthday"

Kason would pick up his sled and walk up the hill all by himself - so nice for the parents :)

he had a blast, except for when he crashed a couple times

33

2012-02-03T05:43:00.000-08:00

One year older today. It is funny how after 30, the years just kind of blend together. When I'm asked how old I am I usually have to think for a minute "is it 31 or 32?" I usually have to think of how old Ehren is and then I figure out my age :). I know, you'd think I would go by the year I was born. But really, the number of years don't matter to me much. Yet :). It is interesting to see how now I'm one of the older people in groups when not that many years ago I was one of the youngest. Now there is a new generation coming after ours and it is just different. I probably have a very limited view of age groups, living in a small town and all, but I am pretty surprised at how different the younger or the so called "millennium" generation is. I looked it up and it's funny that by my birth year I actually still belong to millenniums because I feel so much older than they are. Or at least see life so differently than they do. And again, it is from my very narrowed view of that generation that I come across daily. First, I have to say this generation does not know what commitment means. Whether it is commitment to jobs, church groups, friends, spouses, it is just sad how little that word means to most of the young generation. I feel old in my attitude that when I sign up to do something or say I will be part of something I actually follow through and do what I committed to. It also seems like younger and younger people keep having the attitude that they're entitled to everything they see around them. They want a beautiful house before they even get married which took their parents years and years to get, brand new vehicles, big screen tvs, video games, and whatever anyone else is having around them. And they can't wait, they have to have it now. I'm a bit worried about our kids and what kind of life they will be getting into in their young adulthood. I overheard someone telling a friend about his teenage kids: "You know, it is really hard getting Christmas presents because all our kids want is stuff that's expensive like iphone, camera, laptop, ipad, etc." And a lot of people actually do that, they max out their credit cards to make their kids happy. Part of me thinks that pretty much starts up their attitude of getting whatever, right now. But I sure hope I'm wrong. I hope there are still sensible young people out there and kids that want to follow God more than anything else. I guess all we can do is teach our own kids values from the Bible, even though Kade sometimes thinks it gives him the right to "correct" his friends' behavior. On one hand I want to shush him and tell him to talk in love, but on the other hand I am tired of people in the US tip toeing around every politically incorrect area. Someone needs to be the one spreading the truth, even if it's hard to hear. And really, most people don't want to hear it. Even I have a hard time with it because I hate any kind of conflict but then I'm always glad when someone else speaks up. We need to be bolder and I hope the new generations will bring that because they will need to be bold, even bolder than we have to be at this time.

Well, that is enough of blabbing about how the world is ending. :) Kason and Ani asked me if I was going to have a party for my birthday because that is the most import thing to them about anyone's birthday. I told them there's no party, but we may have a yummy treat to kind of celebrate. :) There are a few restaurants near us that give you free food on your birthday, but sadly I will have to do that on March 2nd since all my IDs say that is my birthday. Oh well, at least I have 2 birthdays for a while.

My dad wrote a very nice e-mail to me for my birthday and it made me think about how I was just 16 when I first came to the States for a year. I see that so differently now that I am a mom. I think I'd be terrified to let any of our kids go so far at only 16. But they did, they trusted me and God that I would be safe. Only 4 years later they had to let me go again, their only daughter, and this time for good and again they trusted God. It makes me cry when I think about it because in a way, you are losing your child. Not only to a son-in-law but also to a country that is thousands of miles away. And when I think that Kade will be 16 in just 8 short years, it scares me to think that he would leave. And he might. I joke sometimes that God will bring it upon me and one of my kids will leave me for a Slovak spouse (or something like that) because that's what I did to my parents. :) And I pray I would have the strength they had to let me go. They were so supportive and so great with letting me make my own decisions even though it was pulling their hearts apart and still does in many ways. And it is something that will always be painful for me too, to be away from my family and country, no matter how many years will pass. But I guess, it's just making the most of where I am at, where God led me. To be available and willing and when I do, my own selfish desires seem so minor and so unimportant in the Big scheme of things.

no school day

2012-01-16T18:15:00.000-08:00

It is Martin Luther King's Day today and so kids didn't have school. Even though this weekend was so nice out and we had a lot of fun outside, it can get cold fast and so today was way too cold for kids to play outside. They tried but even the tough 8 year old boys came inside after a little while because the wind was just too cold. But we had plenty to do inside. Ehren built a new wall in the basement to keep the kids out of the furnace and tools area and he put our old scrap sheetrock on it. When I saw it up there Sunday night I go: "so it's ok for the kids to paint on this stuff since we'll take it off eventually?" Even though I said kids, I think I really just meant myself :) and a little painting therapy for me. I don't know why I like painting so much but it just does something to me. I don't do it nearly enough to get better at it but I feel so much better after I do some painting. The kids were excited to help me paint too and they did a pretty good job until they got bored with it. Ehren got home and his first comment was: "I thought you were going to let the kids paint" :) So now I'm thinking in the near future I will let the kids do whatever scribbles, art they want on another wall that's not showing on my pictures. There is still plenty of space to do that but if someone comes over they will see our big wall art first :) I was sure glad I had a lot of old paints left over from painting the kids bedrooms otherwise we would run out of our tiny kids' paint jars right away. I have to say I'm very thankful for our basement and I even like the fact that it's not finished for now because the kids can ride their bikes or trikes and just burn off some energy when they can't go outside. It is just a fun place for them to be and I'm glad we could brighten up their space down there with a bit of paint.

the wall you see coming down the stairs

our "sign-in" wall where we can have friends sign in that come to visit

Kade and Laadyn helped me paint this simple picture
on the other wall

our new train table from a garage sale, foam mats and tent
to keep the kids entertained

Ani loved skating and is getting better but not quite skating on her own

Kason didn't want to try skating at first but he
did pretty well and could stand up all by himself on
the ice right away without falling

Kade played hockey with friends
which he just loved

no more naps

2012-01-13T11:09:00.000-08:00

And the dreaded day finally came when none of our kids need a nap. I say dreaded because talking to some stay at home moms, nap time is just our little piece of Heaven. A few months back Kason started really fighting taking naps, but then he eventually slept for 2 hours or so almost every day. So I knew he still needed them and even about 2-3 weeks ago he still took naps every day with no problem. And then after New Years sometime he just decided he's done with naps. There was no fighting this time because I was thinking we would just gradually go to naps every other day and see how he is by the end of the day with no nap. But, he was right. He doesn't need them anymore at all. The first whole week without naps went just fine, with no crabbiness in the evening or anything. He is ready for bed by 8pm but it's like he didn't go thru any time of adjustment to sleeping less. So it is still a bit of a shock to my system because all of a sudden the nap time is not so quiet. If I'm lucky the 3 of them will quietly watch something for a little while, but most of the time Kason wants to play loud, especially if there is a sister and a cousin who will too. So instead of Kason adjusting to his day without a nap, I think it is really me who's adjusting. :) Naptime has been my little break from the chaos and kids and I really coveted those moments. But I know I just have to refocus more on the kids now during that time and that's not a bad thing. It comes with our kids growing up so I need to embrace it. And really, I do want to spend time with Anika and Kason during that time because next Fall Ani will be in school all day and Kason in preschool and I won't ever have time like this with both of them. I just thought today about Kason going to preschool next year and how sad it makes me feel. Our baby is growing up and he asks me almost every day when he can go to school. He is pretty attached to me on one hand, but on the other he wants to follow his big brother and sister so bad. There are some positives to not needing a nap anymore though :). It is nice when we are busy over the weekend or on trips and we don't ever have to worry about Kason's nap. Of course, there are times he may need to go to bed at 7pm but when you're up and about he'll be ok without a meltdown at everything because he missed his nap. And that is a wonderful thing. So I'm going to embrace this change and brainstorm some ideas of projects and activities I can do with the kiddos in the afternoon so they get to do something constructive and I get a little bit of time to myself.

sofa table

2012-01-11T06:26:00.000-08:00

I got an early birthday gift from Ehren - he built me a sofa table. I can't stop looking at it, it looks just like I imagined it to. I got an inspiration on Pinterest (of course) which led me to a blog with step-by-step instructions on how to do it. So Ehren didn't have to come up with it on his own, but he did tweek it a little bit to make it look nicer because the original was showing a lot of the pressed wood surface and ours now shows more of the real wood which looks a lot better. I spent some time staining it black so that the wood grain would still show thru and it's great. I can't say enough about it, it's perfect. I have to say Ehren did a great job with it and he's discovering that he really likes projects like that for which I'm really glad. The whole project came to around $70 after Ehren got the extra decorative pieces but the cheapest bookshelf I found at Ikea that is very similar to this (but it is painted solid black) was $190 so we saved a lot of money and it is ours, it is so much more valuable when it is something we made ourselves. Of course, this is leading to new projects now :), one that I've been thinking about for a while is a big dining room table. I really want Ehren to build one but first I need to find enough of old wood we can use for the top. So it may take a while for that but we do have a table there right now, the problem is that it only sits 6 people and if we have anyone over besides the 5 of us, we have to put someone in the kitchen or have 2 tables in the dining room.
So here are the pictures of the sofa table:

Ehren's job is finished

starting to stain - I got a bit high from it :)

finito!

In its place - stilll need to figure out what to put in all the bins,
but I'm sure we will fill it up. The lamp is temporary, I want to find a nicer one for it.

another pinterest idea - easy kids paintings. They loved it especially
Kade because he finally made something that looked cool, like he said.

I finally got to cross country ski with Audrey. It was so much fun
and I could have kept going for hours.

Kason and Ani are sending us off

No kids

2012-01-06T11:26:00.000-08:00

It came out of nowhere. We needed someone to watch our kids for tonight and when we asked Ehren's parents, they had plans for going to the cabin this weekend. And they just left, with our 3 kids and Emily! I was so excited when they said they could take the kids with them, the whole 2 nights at home with no kids. It has been so long since we just had a quiet alone time like this and both Ehren and I just couldn't wait for today to come. :) I know, it sounds like we really don't like our kids but I think it is very healthy to spend some alone time as couples, even during those years when the kids are little. I love doing stuff with our kids but when there is never a time for me doing something with just Ehren it shows on my relationship with him. I wonder how many couples in their 40s-50s find themselves all of a sudden alone with their kids gone and not having anything in common with their spouse. Not knowing what they could possibly do together because all they've ever done were things with their kids. And I really don't want that to happen to us. So here is to a really fun weekend for us, even though I want to do a lot of cleaning/organizing and Ehren has to go to work for a few hours on Saturday. Oh, and did I mention I don't have to cook or feed anyone for 2 days? Yes! :)

My 2 one-year-olds are taking their nap right now and the whole house is quiet. I have all this time to clean, read, sit or do absolutely nothing and it is lovely. :) Time to enjoy this blessing and recharge.

If I were a.....

2011-12-28T08:08:00.000-08:00

yes, his handwriting needs a lot of work :)

Kade gave us a card for Christmas he was working on at school. They laminated it and everything but it was just so cute what he wrote inside. They were supposed to answer "if I were a Santa Claus I would..." Ehren and I had a good laugh about the very first thing he wrote. "I would help mom with daycare because she has a hard time with it." :) Sweet little Kade has no idea how true that is sometimes and I am sure he witnessed more than a few stressful occasions the past couple years. I am not going to lie, it is very hard work to have multiple kids at home that come from all different families. I probably mentioned this earlier but this Fall I realized how much easier this year is compared to last year when the 2 youngest were just babies and had to be bottle-fed a few times a day. I think I was just surviving for a few months there. :) This year they're walking around and just like hanging out with the other kids and play by them. My favorite age though must be around 2-5 years old. Kids are so sweet at that age, they love to read books after books, they listen so well, are eager to please and want to do whatever you suggest for them to do. They will fight once in a while, but it is so short-lived and they don't remember crying 2 minutes later. I don't know if it's just me but I do think many times I'm doing a terrible job with it and I should be doing so much more with the kids but at the end of the day, there is only so much I am able to do. I am thankful though that in return, I don't have to send my kids to some daycare and I can be with them at home, even if it means we can't go anywhere during the day.

Kade's other line said: "If I were a Santa Claus I would buy my family some food because we run out of food a lot." :) So true, we need to buy groceries A LOT. :) No wonder when we have 7 kids at our house at some point every day. At least I have not heard a line from our kids yet that every kid says at some point : "we have nothing to eat" so I think that is pretty good. We really are blessed at how much we have in comparison to people all over the world. We don't know what it's like to skip a meal because there is nothing left to eat yet we don't ever think of it as a blessing, more like it's our right to have all that and so much more that we could so easily live without. It's really sad how consumer oriented our world is becoming and how few simple things remain as part of our family life. I can't say I'm living a minimalist lifestyle, it is far from it actually, but it just amazes me how so many families are driven by having more stuff in their lives and how whatever the children suggest or want at an early age, they get without even having to wait for it. I'm a bit afraid of what our children will have to deal with in their adulthood, it's hard enough right now but is going downhill too fast. :) I just hope we can stick to our believes as our kids get older and have them see it's ok to be different. It's ok to go against the flow, to be the only fish sometimes swimming against all the other fish that we see. Because the only One that matters sees us and is so proud watching us do just that.

Merry Christmas!

2011-12-26T20:05:00.000-08:00

Our stomachs are way too full and we're all very sleepy - a sign of a good Christmas. :) It really was a nice Christmas with the family. Our kids were so excited for Christmas Eve and just loved all their presents. Ehren's dad ended up spending the evening with us and it was nice having him with us. Audrey wasn't feeling quite well yet and needed some rest so she didn't come that evening. Kade had no idea what he was getting but the 2 gifts he got he just loves. One is the "snap circuits" which has about 500 projects to do, from simple to very complicated. It is always a great toy to have for the long winter nights and I'm so glad he enjoys it. The other thing he got was this hexbug set with bugs for all the kids and all the kids love watching these little bugs run around, race and bump each other. Anika got a dollhouse and she couldn't believe she got something like that. It's beautiful, wooden and she loves it. Her, Emily and Kason love playing house or pretend games with all their animals and dolls so I know they will love playing with the dollhouse and the dollhouse 7 family members. Kason's favorite gift must have been the one from nana, it is a little track from the cars movie that has 2 cars race down to the finish line. He loves anything to do with the spycars, the cars movie and race cars. He likes trains too but is starting to lose interest in Thomas a bit as he's getting close to 4 years old. It was just a nice, relaxing Christmas Eve. The next day I got to skype with my family for a bit and then we headed over to Ehren's parents for the Hanson Christmas brunch. It was very nice and we had such a nice time visiting with everyone. The kids are getting so much easier to handle now when we get together and they all play together so nice that us adults can actually enjoy some conversations and even play "catch phrase" or "gestures". :) All the kids were definitely overly tired from a few late nights in a row and not napping but they were all really good and everyone had a great time. Jess made the day for all the kids when she gave them rides on her 2 horses. Ingrid and I came along too and it was just great to get some fresh air on such a nice and WARM day for Minnesota so just a perfect weather to do that. We visited some more with Ehren's parents and sister and her family today but we definitely started feeling a bit sluggish from eating too much food and sweets all weekend. :) I couldn't even look at the food tonight. But it was just a very merry Christmas for me, as Christmas should be. The only thing better would be if I could be with my family in Slovakia. But I am thankful for our wonderful families and it makes me sad for those who are in the middle of broken homes where family get-togethers are stress-filled and painful. We have so much to be thankful for and so much we've been blessed with and I just hope I can be a little blessing to someone else. I hope you have had a warm and lovely Christmas with your family and I wish you all a blessed and joyful year 2012.

cousins with great-aunt Judith

Anika's art project

skyping with their cousins in NY

having a good time together

Christmas Eve service at church

frying some tilapia fish

Christmas program

2011-12-19T06:28:00.000-08:00

We are finally done! Last night was our church's annual big Christmas concert where the adult choir sings and at the beginning usually all the kids from the age 2 until 8th grade do some kind of songs/program of their own. This year Ehren and I are teaching a Sunday School class for 4-5 year olds and we had to come up with our little "show". There is another couple that helps us teaching the kids so we don't have to do it every Sunday and they helped us with it too but it was a bit stressful for me. I know it's just little kids and people really don't care, but I always get nervous and stressed out if we have to be up on the stage in front of a packed church, especially when a few of our kids are very unpredictable in what they will do.

I was hoping to come up with new songs for the kids to sing, but nobody was able to help me find simple Christmas songs for little kids. All the songs I know are too hard for them to learn or they are too secular to sing in church. I miss our Slovak little kids songs because we have so many cute and simple Christmas songs to choose from. So anyway, we did our usual 3 songs which the kids sing every year. I'm a bit embarrassed that we couldn't come up with something different but hopefully by next year we will.

To change things up a bit though, I came up with a little skit or lines to say. The kids were holding the letters to spell "Christmas" and they had a line to say what each letter stands for. I couldn't be more proud of them because they all said their lines so well, even better than some of the older kids in school. Our practicing really paid off.

So there was a bit of a craziness but I think that's to be expected from the little kids. When we started singing our 5 year old boy (who is a little autistic and unpredictable) started going all over the place and finally during one of the songs he came down to Ehren and was telling him "I'm nervous". I finally just put him back in his spot and then he was better until the end. Another hard and very embarrassing moment came when the 2 and 3 year old kids had to leave the stage so the older kids can say their lines. Our Kason thinks he should be with the older group and watching us practice the lines didn't help because he knew most of them and he had it in his head that he is going to hold a letter and say a line. So Ehren had to carry him off the stage, balling and having a fit. I understand it's his age and that it's more because both Ehren and I were up there but still it was a bit embarrassing for all those people to see our child having a meltdown. Well, it's done with now and we can move forward. Luckily Kason will be with the older kids next year so he won't feel excluded.

Here's a video clip I uploaded and some pictures of our kids at home. I will have a couple more clips of the songs but I need Ehren's help because I can't figure out how to cut the clips. So check back in a day or two for that.

Christmas baking

2011-12-17T19:34:00.000-08:00

I have to admit one of my most favorite things I enjoy about Christmas is doing all the Christmas baking. As a little girl I couldn't wait to start baking with mom but we did it so different than I'm doing right now. :) My mom makes almost all the goodies just 2 days before up to the day of Christmas Eve because she likes everything fresh and it really is the best. But I learned that if I don't want to be a crazy and a very mean mom, I have to do things ahead of time and freeze them. My problem sometimes is that I have way too many favorite recipes from my childhood for Christmas goodies and to choose just a few is hard. This year I'm skipping the "honey bars" which is like a pretty layered torte cut into very thin pieces. I love it but it doesn't turn out as yummy as my mom's so it's hard to keep trying it. :) I always have to make my favorite and a classic - walnut rolls. Every Christmas after I make a batch I wonder why I don't make them more often because it's so good with coffee. But maybe then it wouldn't be so special if I made them all the time. Our family's favorite must be the Oreo balls - a very American truffle made out of 3 ingredients :). I have to say they are very good, but also pretty rich which is good because 1 or 2 is plenty at a time. I like to have one recipe that is so easy to make and everyone loves them. Another usual that I grew up with are the rum chocolate balls. I love these even though my mom doesn't make these much and even though I'm pretty much the only one eating them at our house. For me it is a nice little treat during the day to have with coffee or tea and it's not too rich or sweet. Another American recipe I make every year are the peanut butter blossom cookies. Everyone loves those too so they don't last very long at our house. So I guess I'm making a mixture of Slovak and American recipes and if I could I would probably make a lot more different goodies but really, we don't need it and what I make is always more than plenty for us.

Now I have to get my final grocery list ready for the Christmas meal. We're having Tilapia fish fillets with a traditional potato salad. I usually skip the cabbage soup I grew up with because I'm not sure who besides Kason would eat it (he eats any vegetable and eats lettuce like bread). For dessert (because we don't have enough goodies to eat :)) I'm going to try a Norwegian rice pudding with raspberry topping which is a Christmas tradition for some people here. I really like it and the kids do too, Ehren not so much but that's ok. :)

That about sums up all about our Christmas food. Here are some preview goodies pictures and I'll post more pictures of our Christmas later. Have a blessed Christmas everyone!

oreo balls

tried something new - linecke. Very good with tea.

rum balls - almost gone :)

my epic failure this year - walnut bread broke on top. I knew the dough wasn't quite right and it got too wet to hold it together. On the bright side - it tastes awesome. I improved the filling this year with the lemon zest and it's fabulous. :)

peanut butter blossoms

presents

2011-12-15T09:59:00.000-08:00

I don't know if a lot of you know the book about 5 love languages. Later on they came up with 5 love languages for kids which I never read but it is basically the same thing, just for parents to figure out how each of their kids feels loved the most. Some kids are just happy with a touch, a moment of cuddling on the couch with mom while others are happiest when they spend quality time with their parents. I realized pretty early on that our oldest Kade's number one thing is receiving gifts. It can be so tricky though to make him feel like he's getting "gifts" without spending money on toys or stuff for him. As he's getting older he understands the value of money better and that he can't have something new whenever he'd love to but you know it is his love language when you see his face just light up when he's getting something. So Christmas time has always been a bit hard because he gets so focused on the gifts and even though a lot of kids do, to me it always seemed like he's more selfish than others and all he can think about is gifts. So every year since he was able to talk about it I tried really hard to keep reminding and instilling the real reason of Christmas to him and showing him how many kids have nothing and yet they're happy and don't ask for anything.

I'm not sure if he was really hearing me in the past but this year I could not be more proud of my Kade. He actually for the first time in his life can't even think of anything he'd like for Christmas. He says he has a lot of stuff and doesn't really need anything else. He would like some new books to read and the only other thing he really asked for was a math practice test cd that helps him with his math at school. I just couldn't be happier when he said that to me, he seems to be growing up so much and getting so much more responsible about everything. He's at the top of his class for passing math levels yet he wanted the cd so he can get even better. :) I am pretty sure I'll be spending hours and hours in agony over the math with Anika to make up for not having to do much with Kade but for now I'll just enjoy it. I'll enjoy our kids growing up and enjoy the Christmas when Kade is not expecting anything at all. And I'm just excited for him to open the gifts because I'm sure he'll love it.

Kason is too little to really care about the presents, he wants to get something if others are getting a gift but he doesn't care whatsoever what gift it is, it can be a $.99 matchbox car. And Anika has always been very undemanding and never asks for things even if she'd love to have something. I love taking her shopping because she never once asks to have something, she is just excited to be looking at all those pretty things. :) So I guess we're lucky that it is just one child that is a bit more focused on gifts than others and even he is growing out of it. I feel blessed by our kids and this Christmas I just want to be with them, snuggle together, play games and watch them enjoy every part of it.

Oh, and this is for my mom: Kade asked if we can have paprikas for our Christmas meal this year. :) I had to smile because it is probably the most modest meal I know, it comes from Hungary.

2011-12-07T06:16:00.000-08:00

So I found a new obsession. Now that facebook is pretty boring and all I use it for is to connect with a few friends, here comes something that can consume all my extra time. There are times when I have to tell myself "no, you cannot go on pinterest." and that's because it is so addicting and there are so many areas that are just fabulous to look at. From recipes, to fashion, to home decor and design, there is anything people find interesting and fun on the internet and they "pin" it on pinterest. I mainly like it for ideas for the house, recipes or crafts stuff and you can find so many things that it's too easy to get sucked into it. There is one thing I don't like about it so far and that's that all the favorite pins show up over and over so when you're scrolling through things you see the favorite ones repeat a lot because those are ones that a lot of people put on their boards. But despite that little annoyance, I love looking at ideas for just about anything and seeing what my friends on pinterest like too. I'd much rather do that then watch something on tv or when I'm too tired to do anything else. :) I don't know how long it will last and if the things people post will keep staying new and interesting but for now it's great. Of course, moderation is key just like with anything. If I can use my time wisely and not just waste it on this site or other things, it can be used well.

St Nicholas Day tradition

2011-12-06T13:10:00.000-08:00

I don't particularly feel like writing but here I am. I'm trying to get over this small cold I have and the kids are all very tired and crabby today. Somebody woke up before 6am this morning to go check their boots because of course, it's St. Nicholas Day! The kids have been so excited for this day and they couldn't wait to wash their boots the night before. Any other time it would be easy to get mad at them and order them back to bed but you can't help but let them enjoy it because that's what kids do best - enjoy their little surprises thoroughly. Every time Kade is excited about something he just can't sleep and is up way early and of course Kason and Anika wake right up too and I could hear their footsteps all around the house while I tried to catch a little more sleep this morning. I'm glad we do this little tradition and are pretty much the odd ones doing that because nobody does anything here on St. Nicholas. When I talk to other moms about it they do know of the holiday but it is very foreign to them, as it is to Ehren. He enjoys the goodies he gets but doesn't really appreciate the holiday and I can understand because that's how I feel about Thanksgiving Thursday sometime. Anyway, I am so glad our kids love this tradition and what kid wouldn't when they get fun treats. It is pretty much our stockings day because families here do the same thing with stockings on Christmas day. That day we don't do anything, but usually go to Ehren's parents house and his mom has stockings for all the grandkids so our kids still get their stockings too. I am just happy that the stores get all their Christmas candy and goodies so early that I can easily find stocking stuffers by Dec. 5th. I'm surprised Kade still loves this holiday because he knows none of his friends at school or church do it, but he doesn't care. He likes to enlighten them into the whole St. Nicholas tradition and how fun it is. It is just a tiny part of my country and home I brought with me and am determined to keep it in our family no matter what. :) Since I failed at so many other things like the language, I at least want to carry on the family traditions and hopefully we can keep doing it for many many years to come.

Advent wreath is another thing I love having for our meals during Advent, it just doesn't seem like Christmas without it. I found this Swedish wreath on Ebay a couple years ago and I love it. It's simple and I don't have to try to make my own out of ever greens, even though I loved my mom's too. But sometimes if I simplify things I actually do them versus stressing over all the details and not even finishing them. Because traditions can be so simple and yet they mean so much to our kids. They meant a lot to me growing up and now I want to give that to our kids.

I sure hope we have snow for Christmas though because this does not seem right - very cold temperatures but no snow. It must be our first St. Nicholas Day here in the northern MN when there is no snow on the ground. Our kids have been wanting to go sledding so bad that they tried sledding down a little patch of ice in our driveway. :) I would make them a nice frozen slide down our driveway but I don't think Ehren would appreciate that very much, driving our vehicles down the ice.

at Grace and Kevins on Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving

2011-11-22T17:51:00.000-08:00

It is time for another Thanksgiving. That's the American Thanksgiving, from pilgrims to turkey to a pre-Christmas holiday with families. Even though I really don't get into it as much as a lot of people here, it is still a nice break for me from the ordinary, a chance to relax and visit family and friends. When we lived in the Cities I always had to work Friday after Thanksgiving so we would always spend the day on Thursday with Ehren's aunt Grace and her family. Somehow since then it became an unwritten tradition for us to spend Thanksgiving with the Meyers and we really enjoy it. I was really upset when Ehren found out he had to work on Friday after Thanksgiving this year but since then he was able to switch with someone and we're good to go again. :) When we moved up here I thought it would be so easy to get down to the cities and visit friends, family but it is far from easy. We are lucky to get down 3 times a year now and so I want to hold on to our Thanksgiving tradition of going to the Cities because it is one more time we get to go down there.

In the light of Thanksgiving and pilgrims and all, Kade's teacher asked me to come talk to the whole class tomorrow about how I moved to the US and about my country, Slovakia. When I asked her for some examples she said last year they had a lady come talk about her move from Cuba, how she traveled on a boat across the ocean and the hardship of living in Cuba and stuff. I had to laugh to myself when I read that because come on, how is my story anything even comparable to that? It's not like I was running away from a bad or poor place, if anything the first year in the US I wished I never left home. :) So we'll see what the kids think of my sappy love story ending with me moving to the US. Kade is really excited that I'm going to be the guest speaker in his class because I very rarely get to volunteer or help in any way since I have to do daycare.

One thing I've been wanting our family to do for Thanksgiving is to make our own little "thankful tree". I found some nice red branches in our woods and cut out little notes out of scrapbook paper. As part of our "Tuesday family supper" this week we all thought about all the things we are thankful for, wrote them down and hung them on our tree. It is just sad when I think about thousands of things in my life I am thankful for and how quickly I forget about them when something just doesn't go the way I want it to. I've been so spoiled that stupid trivial things that don't matter at all can ruin my day sometimes. So I want to read and remember all those notes my kids wrote (despite some notes mentioning toys and their favorite things) and the ones I wrote because in the end, they are what matter in this life. What I have right here and not the millions of things our society is telling me I need. It is so easy to get sucked in, to compare our life with lives of others, to make sure we're not behind on anything and most importantly to make sure our kids are not lagging behind on any area of life. So here is to a year of thankfulness. To finding little joys every day and treasuring them. To laughing and smiling instead of frowning. And to contentment and peace that's not of this world.

(little Marcel :))
I'm bummed I missed Kade's music performance at
school but they sounded good on the video I saw

smile

2011-11-11T13:10:00.000-08:00

Talking about a smile made me think of a cute story from a few weeks ago. Kade and Anika were going to have a picture day at school. I tried very hard to make them look as nice as possible, did French brades for Anika and all. :) I kind of started coaching Kade a little bit a couple days before the picture day, not because he doesn't pose nice for pictures but because he had a front tooth that was pretty much ready to come out and was hanging way down so it was really noticeable. I tried to show him to not do a big grinny smile where all his teeth would show because that tooth would really stand out. So he practiced a few smiles and I knew it could turn out as whatever no matter what I say or do. Somehow though, I was totally oblivious to the fact that Anika was taking this whole coaching in and was really thinking about her picture day. I don't remember saying much to her other then to smile nice when the photographer says so. I didn't expect much because this was her very first school picture and they really do them quick. Then I totally forgot about the whole thing because it took a long time to get the pictures back. Well, the day finally came a few weeks ago when Kade and Ani brought their pictures back. Kade's turned out very nice even though he showed some teeth and when I look at it it reminds me a little bit of my dad. The funny and cute part came when Anika came home because she was so excited to show me her pictures and she exclaimed "mommy, I didn't show my teeth!" It took me a second to realize what she was talking about and as I pulled the picture out of the envelope, she was right. She made sure her lips stayed tight together and she was so proud of it because she thought that was what I wanted. I had to smile at her and I think I said something like "Ani, I wanted YOU to show your teeth when smiling." :) It is still a very nice picture of her and I don't think you need to smile big to have a good picture, it is just funny how she purposely posed that way.

Every time I think back to that little episode I have to think about how kids pay attention to everything and they think about everything we say. Our little Ani wants to make us so proud and when she figures out something is important to do or not do she tries so hard to do just that. She wants to please us and make us proud so bad and I don't ever want to take that for granted.

As I look at the 2 pictures together I can't help but think about how different Kade and Anika look. Some kids on the bus kept asking Kade if that was really his sister and I don't blame them. They really don't look much alike but I kind of like it. I like the fact that all of our 3 kids look quite a bit different, to go with how different their personalities are.

Teeth

2011-11-07T12:43:00.000-08:00

Today I went to the dentist with a tooth ache and came back home with one less tooth in my mouth.

If you know me well you know I hate everything about teeth. It is mostly because of my horrible gingivitis (gum disease) and even more horrible experiences with dentists in Europe and in the US. If I could make a deal with God to deliver 10 more children so that I never have to put a foot in the dentist office, I would gladly do it. :)

Well, I got one more bad news about my teeth today. I went in with a tooth ache, which I thought would just be a big cavity. Turns out it was way deep inside my tooth, under a huge silver filling. Basically, if they tried to get rid of all the bad stuff in that tooth there would be nothing left to save. So I came home today with one less tooth in my mouth. It's always emotional to have a tooth pulled out and I'm not even sure why. But the panic attack associated with the pain of pulling the tooth out is even worse so my nice dentist gave me the gas and plenty of injections. It still feels weird when they do it, like they are going to pull your whole jaw out. This tooth, whatever the number they kept talking about, is the last one in the back that I can have taken out and not miss it much when chewing. I am just praying now that the tooth next to it will be ok enough to stay for a while. That one too has some cavity but it's hard for them to see how bad it is so we have to wait on that and see. If it turns out bad like the last one, I will need an implant there so I can chew my food. :) I already need another implant right in the front which everyone sees when I smile or talk, and I keep postponing it all the time. The tooth has gotten really crooked from the gingivitis over the last 10 years or so and is not strong enough to stay in if it's corrected. The only logical thing is to pull it out and get an implant instead. I'd love to do that too so I'm not that conscious of my smile all time but it costs so much money I never feel like I can justify it just for a nicer smile. But maybe someday soon I will do it. The implant in the back of my mouth, if it turns out bad enough, will be a lot more important to have done because it's not doing it for a cosmetic effect but for me to be able to chew food properly.

Well, it is a bit gross but teeth issues is something I have to struggle with. We all have something in our life and I do know that I have to be thankful it is just teeth. Really, with cancer and tumors all around me, how could I complain about the stupid teeth. When I hear or read about someone going through chemo it always hits home for me and I quickly realize I have absolutely nothing in my life even comparable to that. So I'll be ok going to my dentist for the 1000s time (and try to be ok with all the dental bills) and I'll be ok with my smile that shows my very imperfect teeth because I have so much more to be thankful for.

sleeping in?

2011-11-05T08:16:00.000-07:00

Saturday is usually the one day when Ehren and I like to sleep in. Not like past 9am sleeping in, that never happens :), just 7:30-8:00 is ideal for us. Now that the kids are all out of the diapers and cribs, we are trying to train them in letting us sleep a little on Saturday. Well, it's on and off depending on which one of them wakes up a little crabby. :) Today was a bit of an off morning. Kade is old enough to just go and find something quiet to do but Kason and Anika think "we're up, let's do our loud role playing, etc". They usually end up in Ani's room and are to a point of yelling about this or that while Ehren and I try to snooze a little more. Sometimes one of us yells out for them to be quiet but that usually doesn't last too long. So this morning I finally got up because I couldn't sleep with the noises anymore. But I really can't complain about our kids' sleeping habits because I know so many parents whose kids still at 3 or 4 years old don't sleep all night by themselves or are up way too early. So I realize that our kids going to bed within minutes of us putting them down at 8pm and getting up at 7am is not that bad at all. I should really be happy that Kason and Ani are such good buddies that they cannot play apart and from the moment they wake up they want to be together. It is so sweet when I think about it yet I can get so mad at them for being loud or wild. It is the prospective and how I choose to look at things that bother me. Here's to a happy Saturday and choosing to smile at my kids.

having company

2011-11-04T19:22:00.000-07:00

I don't know if many women feel this way, but it can be a bit stressful to have company over for dinner. I don't mean people who have been to our place before, who know us, but people we invite over so we can get to know them better. We are trying to do that when we notice a new couple in our church about our age because really, with our busy kids it is way too hard to carry on a nice conversation after church to get to know someone. I am happy if I get to quick say hi to my good friends there, not to mention trying to meet someone new. So we realize it is important for us to have people over and after a few years we learned not to expect a dinner invitation back from them. :) It is funny how after we have had some people over they would say "Oh, we have to have you guys over sometime, it would be fun." But years go by and nothing, we don't get invited once. I'm not bitter, really :) but why do people say things they don't mean? I appreciate when people tell me they just don't like to cook and don't really have people over because then you understand. I think some people just think it's polite to announce they would love to have us over even if they don't mean it. Maybe it's part of the Minnesota nice code. Like smiling "how are you?" as if they really cared but are walking away as you're about to answer "actually,...". That is making a generalization though and my good friends don't do that, which I'm glad. I know for a fact that to most people that don't know me well (and maybe even to those that do know me well) I appear very mad and unfriendly all the time simply because I don't grin at them when I meet them. I just can't fake it. I can't fake a big smile when I don't know someone well enough. It is a little bit of my Slovak culture coming through and really, I am starting to realize it's ok to be that way. It's ok because that is who I am and who God made me to be. I am reserved and not very excited looking with people I don't know well. I need a deeper friendship to break that wall but once it does, I am a friend to stay no matter what. And it is sad but I see way too many shallow friendships that don't mean much even though in conversation you would imagine they're best of friends. I think I would rather have a true friend than one that is polite and smiles at me but doesn't know that inside I'm crying and feeling alone.

Anyway, back to my point. I do love inviting new people over but the stress of getting the house looking just right can be a bit too much sometimes. If it is someone who's been to our house it's fine, you just concentrate on the main living area and it's ok if our bedroom or bathroom is a disaster. But with new people, it is polite to give them a tour of the house which means they will see almost every place of the house and there's no room for leaving at least one room messy. So I've been running around for a day and a half now to start and finish all the laundry, to wash and change sheets on our beds, to clean up and de-clutter every room, to pay the bills, and to get the dinner ready for 4 adults and 7 kids. Not easy when there are 5 little ones running around all day. I know I get that monster look when I do that because I am so focused on getting this house cleaned up or else. I do love it though for an evening or two when the house is still clean and I can finally relax a bit, sit down and enjoy the clean view before it's ruined again. :) I also love doing all the work on Friday and come Saturday almost all the chores are done. It's almost like having 2 Sundays in a row minus going to church. :) We had a really nice time visiting with a couple and their 4 kids tonight and now it feels like the hard work I did was so worth it. I know there are a lot of people who say it's not worth it but clean house matters to me. Our kids just loved having friends over too and were all having a blast. I love family get togethers like that, when everyone has a good time and you just visit and get to know someone a little better.

family dinners

2011-11-02T11:27:00.000-07:00

You read and hear about family dinners everywhere. They say that families that eat dinners together end up a lot stronger and kids grow up with a lot bigger sense of family. I can see just from the time I was young until now, it is less and less common to eat dinners at home together as a family because everyone is so on the go and some family members are either at a sport, activity or other outing. And I do understand there are many families where husbands and wives have to work opposite shifts because that's the only job they can find and many other reasons people can't do it. But we are not one of those families and so finally this year, Ehren and I decided to start our little family tradition so we don't slip into that mode of never eating together. Weekends are usually pretty crazy for us since that's the only time I can go out and do some shopping or visit with friends or have someone over or whatever. So besides the weekend I thought we need to make a use of our nice dining room and have special dinners together once a week. It has been a few weeks now that on a Tuesday night, I make a nice home-made meal with dessert and everything and we all eat together and talk. It's funny how we got so used to just eating in our kitchen since there is plenty of room for all of us but doing this once a week it makes it special to eat where we usually eat only for special occasions. The kids get excited now when we have our nice dinners in the dining room and I have to say it is a nice little break from the usual quick dinners. And it's not that we don't eat together the rest of the week, most of the days we still do but because of some activities and things that come up, me and the kids usually eat before Ehren is even home from work. But on Tuesday night, we have nothing going on and we just spend the whole evening together as a family. I'm really enjoying it even though some of the times I just sit there during dinner, listen to the kids talk about their day and really, my head is a mush from a busy day so I barely say anything (as Ehren pointed out the other time:)). But I don't think that matters because really, I just enjoy the time with all of us at the table and Ehren not using any tech gadgets for a night. It is one more thing I added to my list to simplify my life. Because it is time devoted to just our family. I really hope we can continue this tradition as the kids grow older and more independent from us. Because our family matters to God and it matters to me.

Halloween

2011-10-31T18:55:00.000-07:00

So, the Halloween finally came and can I just say "is it over yet?" :) If it was one night and is done with, but we've been having Halloween for a few days now because each class at school does their little dress-up party on a different day. So I've been dressing up Kason and Ani into their costumes like 5 times and Kason probably 5-10 times a day. :) I can't complain, they really loved it. We had a very fun get-together at Kjell and Jessica's house with friends from church on Saturday. We had a bon fire, hay ride, some kids wore their costumes and everyone had such a good time. It was a great turn out too and I think we had around 50 people there. It was so nice to just stand by the fire and enjoy some adult conversations while the kids were squealing and running around the huge yard. Somehow, I enjoyed it too much to take some pictures but I hope to see someone else's pictures online. And finally, today came and time for the real "trick-or treating".

Anika is discovering more about the Halloween world this year probably because of being in school and has asked me the other day how come we don't have any scary things in front of our house. So I tried to answer as simply as I could saying that God doesn't like scary things and doesn't want us to be scared. So now when she sees scary things in front of someone's house she points it out to me and says "mom, they don't know about God either." :) It just makes me smile.

Now we are finally done but I have to say, it is our first Halloween "way up North" when we didn't have to bundle up and we didn't even need hats or mittens. That's probably my favorite part about tonight. :) Our first stop was a church in town that hosted a Harvest festival and the kids had a lot of fun there. Kason just spent most of his time in the bouncy houses, Anika took her time decorating a big cookie with all kinds of candy and then ate it all, and Kade went around the whole place and played every single game you could play to win candy/trinkets. After that we went to see Ehren's great aunt Judith at the nursing home and we did some runs in a popular neighborhood. Finally, we made our way to nana and papa's house and were ready to be done. Kids' buckets were full, they had a lot of fun and all pretty much crashed a few minutes after we got home. It may be a different story tomorrow when Kason will be begging for his bucket of candy all day. :) Well, another Halloween behind us and it was good. It is a nice family outing for us, especially now that all 3 kids understand what it is about. Despite a few creepy costumes and decorations we came across, we had a good time. And Ehren and I are both beyond exhausted. :) Good night to all!

At the ECFE last week

Lots of activities to do

my 2 babies having fun with their outfits

kitty, superman and waluigi

Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

2011-10-25T08:19:00.000-07:00

I know, the title looks like a kid held the "R" key down or something but it is the perfect title for my thought for the day. Our little Kason has been making these funny sounds once in a while, almost like he's stuttering but he's doing it for fun, on purpose. Ehren asked about it the other day but I guess I got so used to hearing it I don't even notice it anymore. Until, this past week Kason mastered his little tongue game and discovered how to roll his Rs perfectly. I could not be more proud when I heard him over and over going "rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr" with the perfect sound - like a true Slovak. :) Trying to teach different phrases and words in Slovak to Kade and Anika, seems like the letter "r" is the hardest for them to get right, or as they say to "roll their Rs" so then the whole word sounds American when they say it. So when Kason did that I couldn't believe it. Ehren can't learn it still and I don't know if some people just never learn it or what. So of course, I've been coaching Kason now to repeat all the Slovak words with "r" in it because I don't want him to forget this skill. He is pretty proud of his "rrrrrrrrrrrrr" sound though and is doing it quite a bit during the day. I think it is a tiny reminder to me that now is my time to pour my all into our kids, no matter how hard and tiring it is and no matter how reluctant they are about it. They will soon be gone but they are here now, ready to learn what I have to teach them.

Anika

2011-10-24T19:33:00.000-07:00

Anika had a big day today. First she had preschool and she couldn't stop talking about all the things they did there. In the afternoon I had to take her to the doctor for her 5th year check up, a long-time dreaded appointment because she was getting all the shots that are required for Kindergarten next Fall. I have been preparing her about the shots for months now and she knew that after her birthday she was going to get them. I finally scheduled the appointment for today and she was so great. It seems like she is growing up so much in every way. To make it a fun day for her instead of a scary one, I told her that when she is brave at the doctor we will go to Dairy Queen for a treat. She was so excited about the DQ that I don't think anything else mattered at all. I was trying to remember when the last time was we took our kids there for a treat and I couldn't even remember because it is such a huge treat at our house. Well, I think it is mostly due to my thinking that it is just an overpriced ice cream place (which it is :)) but I guess once in a great while it's ok. Especially when I see Ani's bright blue eyes just light up with excitement when she talks about it. The doctor's appointment went great and Anika did really well even though she was a bit shy with the doctor. It was a bit long too but the 3 shots at the end finally came. Ani was so brave and I know it was hard for her because sometimes just the thought of getting hurt makes her cry. :) So the first 2 shots she just made a little face but didn't even peep which shocked me. The last shot was something that I guess hurts as it shoots into the body so she did let out a little cry but I was so surprised that was it. I was really expecting fighting with her, or even having to hold her tiny body down but she did awesome. My brave little girl. We sat down at DQ and enjoyed our treat and I told her how proud I was of her. But I think she's taking after her dad with the ice cream because I barely started mine when she was all done with hers. :) Afterwards we ran some errands and just took our time while Ehren was with the boys plus 3 extra kids at home. Anika was just in Heaven and she wouldn't stop talking from all the excitement. I think it's so important to spend one on one time with our kids once in a while, which is not easy to do in the midst of all the commitments, schedules, etc. But kids sure love the time with mom or dad alone, not having to fight for their attention and just feeling special for that one moment. I am really thankful I had this moment with Ani today, thankful for a husband that made sure we had all the time we wanted and I hope I have many more moments like these with her and my boys.

Kade

2011-10-17T20:36:00.000-07:00

I am so proud of our Kade. He is very smart, sometimes too smart for his own good. :) It is funny, he is only 8 but it sure feels like he's in early teens some days. Just very opinionated, thinks he knows everything best and it is becoming a whole new level of parenting for us. It is not "do this because I said so" anymore, or at least not most of the times. We have to actually discuss things, attitude, and why we do it and so on. :) Sometimes I miss the days when he would just love to help me with anything, I would tell him to get some small chore done and he would be all excited to do it for me. Now, not so much. Although the chore chart works wonders and we let him earn money for completing them which we put in his savings account. He knows exactly how much money is in there at all times and he likes to save up for some toys or things so that's great. He always used to love Math at school, it was his favorite but this year he decided he likes reading the most. It makes me so happy because I am not a reader. I think I read really slow in comparison to other people but it's been also hard for me to read because I hate putting a book down when I'm in the middle of it and would stay up until 2, 3 am reading it. So then I just don't read because I feel like what's the point when I can't finish them for a month. Anyway, I've always read to our kids a lot, ever since they were babies and I feel like it's paying off now because they all like reading a lot. If I had the time they would love it if I read books to them for hours. It is still our naptime routine to sit on the bed or couch, all cuddled together and we read books. It helps Kason now because he hates taking naps and almost doesn't need them anymore but reading books first eases him into it and he knows once we're done it's time for the nap. Kade is getting bored with the little kids' books though and loves reading chapter books. I'm glad our library has a lot of them and he went through so many books from there over the summer. Just this week, Kade's precious journal came that he ordered online. He paid for it with his own money and he just wanted a diary so bad, but it had to have a lock so we had to get it online. I'm not sure why it had to have a lock because he doesn't care if I read it and Kason and Anika couldn't read it even if they wanted to. :) But, I was glad because his handwriting can use any practice it can get. This year, in the 3rd grade they focus a lot on handwriting which is Kade's biggest struggle and he hates it too. But it was funny to me, looking for diaries everywhere, they sell them only for girls. Or I should say like 98% I found were all for girls and that is sad. It would be great to encourage boys to write and they would love it if they made some cool ones for them. Ones that don't show skeletons or pirates, which is the only thing I was able to find.

We just had our parent-teacher conference tonight. Kade's teacher this year is very different from the one last year and Kade has missed her so much. The 2nd grade teacher was young, very sweet all the time and promised to never yell at them which was the most important thing to Kade. After the first 2 or 3 weeks of the 3rd grade Kade would come home and tell me he doesn't like his teacher now because she yells a lot. I said "well, I yell a lot too" but he's more scared of her I think. :) I think it has gotten a lot better though, she told us tonight she never yells but she is just a louder person (I'm not sure I believe her "never yelling" part though :)). Anyway, it went really well and he's doing great with everything. It is great to see him having good friends in his class, even though they get in trouble together. It is funny how every little thing is a competition to these boys. Whether it's a Math test or standing in line to go to the next room, they have to be first and so the teacher is having a little hard time with that but it's nothing bad. They're just boys and it's good to see Kade coming out of his shell a bit more this year. He sure is growing up, getting more brave and is learning about who he is and who he wants to be. It makes me a bit scared about being a good parent because it gets so much harder each year. There are so many more issues to wrestle with than when they are toddlers or preschoolers. I will have to write soon about the book I am almost done with - "a Grace-based Parenting". It is teaching me so much about the way I approach our kids every day and mostly about how it's ok to let them go out into the world because that is how God designed it. He made us a part of this world, not a part of our little Christian world behind a huge gate so we can stay safe and harmless. But more about that some other time. It's time for bed.

thank you for coming

2011-10-15T12:30:00.000-07:00

I think I'm going to have to take the number of views out of my blog because I am feeling a bit self conscious about so many people reading what I write. I am kind of hoping that my parents are just clicking on the same page over and over so it counts for more people than it is. :) No, it is great and I'm thankful for everyone that comes here but at the same time I worry if I am offending someone because I can be pretty high strong on some things at the moment, when in fact it's not like I am dwelling on those things or I am upset about them. I just like writing random things down that I've been thinking about so I apologize if it's dumb or insensitive or just plain boring some days. It is crazy that once you start blogging you do tend to think about oh, I bet nobody cares about these stupid little thoughts I have but then I have to think back to why I started this. It is a bit of a therapy for me, to see the light at the end of my tiny tunnels and to appreciate all the small and boring things in my life. :)

presents

2011-10-15T07:02:00.000-07:00

I've been thinking about Christmas presents already because it will come before we know it and it seems like it is always a bit stressful to find the right gifts for our kids or someone special. Especially when it comes to the kids, you don't want them to get too many presents that they just expect getting more and more each year. It can be hard as the kids get older and they watch what their friends have, especially in this day of tech toys and video games. On one hand it is good for them to learn about computers and tech gadgets when the whole world is going that way but on the other hand how much do they need. The big thing for younger kids like our Kade is to have a cell phone. Really? Who are they going to call? Ehren and I don't even have normal cell phones and I don't see any reason for our kids to have one until they drive. Anyway, Christmas can get a bit carried away in some families where aunts and uncles buy gifts for everyone. We are just a very materialistic society and I don't think it will change. If it changed we would have a huge economy crisis. :) But talking to some friends and family, our kids really don't need anything. They have plenty of toys and plenty of things to do. With our family, we used to do the cousin exchange for Christmas but it came up to be cheaper gifts that kids didn't really need anyway so we decided to just do Operations Christmas Child instead. I usually show our kids youtube videos of different countries around the world where the children are getting the shoe boxes and it is so fun for our kids to see that. When you see those kids getting so excited about their first present in their whole life, it just makes sense and it makes you feel like why do we think we deserve all these things in our lives. We also buy gifts at Samaritan's Purse where you can buy goats, chickens or cows for families in third world countries in the name of someone. I really enjoy doing that versus trying to find the right gift that the person will like. We do get some special gifts for our kids though because birthdays and Christmas is about the only time they get new toys and they get so excited for it. It just doesn't have to be anything huge because really, they are happy about a lot of little things but I am more conscious now about buying them toys that are good quality and have some educational value in it. I can see though that it is tougher with teenagers and older kids that want a lot more expensive gifts and seeing some families I know I don't know how they're able to afford gifts that they get unless they use credit cards or loans. It is just good to remember the real reason for Christmas and talk about it often with our children so we can help them move away from what I am getting and towards what I am giving to others around me.

girls

2011-10-14T12:53:00.000-07:00

It is Friday and I was excited for the weekend to start until a couple bad news came a little while ago. First, it looks like Ehren has to work the day after Thanksgiving which is when we love going to the Cities for a long weekend and then my good friend called and she can't make our little getaway tomorrow either. Bummer! It's so easy to just get all mad and dwell in the self pity but I can make the best of it too. It's my choice. But that's not what I was going to write about. I just had to complain to the world a little. :)

I have to say this friend I was excited to hang out with is a big answer to a prayer for a good friend in my life, ever since we moved up here 5 years ago. I can't believe it's been that long because it feels like we're still so new to the community and even our church. I do have good friends, the problem is most of them are either too busy for me or we don't have that much in common and at this point in my life it is hard to find good friends who aren't already taken. :) I know, it's silly but that's the truth as far as women go. I am not sure if a small town makes it worse, sometimes it feels that way. And very likely I may seem that way to other women so I'm not trying to slam others here. Us girls are very funny creatures. Of course, there are a lot of exceptions to the rule, but it is interesting to me how many women around me are still in their adulthood very insecure in so many aspects of life and are constantly comparing themselves to that prettier or trendier or more of a "Martha Stewart" woman next to her. I am no exception, I'll do that more times than I would want or even admit but at the same time I am surprised to find out I am not in a minority and a lot of women around me struggle with those things daily. In some ways guys are spared of so much drama in their life. :) My absolute biggest pet peeve when it comes to women friends (and really to be fair I don't know too many women who do this) is when someone is "bragging" about doing this or that with their Best friend. It is very middleschool-ish to me, but I am finding how so many women don't change since high school and it is still about who is your best friend and who you're "playing with" and "not playing with". Seriously (something my 8 yr old would say)? But I try to just ignore it when I see it and be very careful not to ever brag about my friendships and even say the word best friend because really, you don't know who could be the biggest blessing to you today or tomorrow. And you don't know if the person that is listening isn't wishing she did that with you instead and was called someone's best friend. If we don't reach out and invite new people in we will never know if they can be our new "best" friends. I just joined a new Bible study with about 7 women of all different ages and it is so good to be able to share struggles/challenges/life with them. I especially like listening to and talking with the older women who have been where I am, who have had their shares of hurt, disappointment and joy. Women need each other whether they like it or not and I hope I don't close the door on any woman who is lonely and can't fit in with anyone. It is so easy to do when we don't purposely look for them but they're out there, at every social gathering I can think of.

superman

2011-10-13T11:42:00.000-07:00

Halloween is a holiday I don't think I'll ever understand and really I have no idea if we should even be encouraging our kids to participate in it but since it is about candy and dressing up, the kids love it way too much to take it away. Growing up in Slovakia, our "Halloween" was All Saints' Day. Even though my family is not catholic, our country is mostly catholic and so a lot of church holidays follow the catholic lead. I must say, it is a much more beautiful and peaceful celebration than our American Halloween. Everyone goes to the graves of their loved ones, lights candles around the graves, people bring beautiful fresh flowers and just remember those they've lost. I just have this image in my head when I think about it - pretty candles lighting up the dark cemeteries, everyone being very quiet and whispering (I'm not sure why you have to be quiet at the cemeteries, like we're interrupting the dead people's precious rest, but it's a rule). Every time I remember that I can almost smell the burning candles, love that smell. :)

Anyway, since Halloween is coming I had to start thinking what our kids could wear and how we can do it without buying new outfits. Well, I almost did it but then I did let Kade buy his favorite Mario character costume. I was working really hard with Kason so he would choose one of our costumes from Kade when he was about his age. The first one was a bit too small, the second one only lasted a day and he didn't like it. I was starting to think I may have to come up with something new but then Kade dug out one costume I almost forgot about - the superman. Kason has been so into spiderman lately which Kade never was and I don't know how it even started but I thought for sure he wouldn't care for the superman because it is NOT spiderman. But to my delight, he loves superman and I got more than I wished for because he likes it a little bit too much. He knows where it is at all times and he brings it to me at least 4 times a day so I would put it on him. He would just keep it on all day but I told him it is only for inside and he can't eat in it so it stays nice for Halloween. :) I can't help but smile at him as I put it on for the 100th time because every single time I put it on his face lights up and he is so proud of his outfit. "I like my superman costume, mom" he says every time. I love our little superman and it fits him so well. He is so determined and so excited about some things and there is not much that can stand in his way once he sets his mind on it. Anika is really excited to be a cat and I'm so glad because it didn't cost anything and it is really cute. One day before the kids are too old for it though I am going to make m&m costumes for them, each of them a different color m&m. That would be really cute but this year, only one of the children was on board with that so it has to wait a little. So for now, we have a little superman at our house and I'm curious to see if it will stop once Halloween is over.

just a couple fall pictures

breaking the Fall cycle

2011-10-12T13:47:00.000-07:00

I have decided that I must be getting old. Or else it is the "living up North" syndrome. :) While we lived in the Cities and even when Kade was 2 years old I remember how it was nothing to get up at 4:45am, go to the health club or go for a run outside. Now, when the fall comes all I want to do is sleep and when that alarm goes off before 6am, more times than not I just turn it off and snooze a bit more before I have to get the kids up for school. I feel totally pathetic, like an old lady who needs her 9-10 hours of sleep. Where is my energy going? I also blame my mom's heavenly goose down comforters she gave us. Ever since we have them both Ehren and I sleep sooo well (well, Ehren has his sleeping issues like all his siblings but he still loves the comforter). Especially on cold nights it just feels way too good to get out of by the time the morning comes. But still, I definitely feel this pull inside of me every Fall to just be lazy, curl under a blanket with a book or a good show instead of being active, workout or something. I have to really force myself to do the extra stuff when not too long ago I couldn't wait to get out there. The darkness at 7pm doesn't help me either, but really this bear hibernation feeling is not fun. Seems like every Spring I try to get myself up and running again because I get so out of shape from the rare workouts over the Fall/Winter. Usually, the thing that gets me off my butt like a whip is when my pants start to get too snug but somehow, I am not even gaining weight so that stinks because in my "bad" mind I feel like I don't need to workout because I'm still the same size or even losing weight. :) Anyway, it is time for me to break the cycle this year. I will stick to more than 2 runs and workouts a week! :) I miss my colleagues who would do this with me, one time we had a calendar going with stars for each workout we did and that was a motivator! Now I don't have that but maybe I should start my own "star" calendar and see if that helps. Well, I am working out tonight no matter what. I guess just one day at a time. Happy Staying-Active Fall to you!

a blessed Monday

2011-10-10T11:44:00.000-07:00

Mondays are usually not my favorite days. The weekends go by way too fast and to have one extra day "off" would be so lovely but here we go, back to work with the kiddos and usually a mountain of laundry from the weekend. Both Ehren and I were a bit more tired after this weekend because we pretty much spent the whole Saturday cleaning the house, inside and out for Ehren's colleagues' party. Not too many came but it was nice to have them over and for Ehren to show them he appreciates their work. Then Sunday we had the Hanson family over for dinner and it is so fun to watch when the cousins get together now as they're getting older. They get all excited and loud and just have fun with each other. So by Sunday night, we were pretty pooped and Ehren was wishing he didn't have to go to work this morning. Well, he didn't get his wish but somehow I got mine and what a blessing it was. I knew my 2 nieces weren't going to come today but then I got a call this morning that Carson, my other one year old was not coming today either. Yes! I was so excited. :) I get to spend the day with my 2 sweethearts and feel like a regular stay home mom for a day. It has been the best morning ever. I got some cleaning done, workout done, I took kids with me to run a few errands including big grocery shopping and I just loved it. Sometimes I envy moms that stay home only with their kids because they get to do all their cooking/shopping/errands running with the kids during the day. For me, most of that has to wait until the evening, after dinner and it is so hard to do that when I'd much rather stay home with my family and play games with them, be there for bed time and stuff. But today, I got to do that and it totally made my day. I just smiled this morning and thanked God because He knew so well how much I needed a bit of a break. Now I'm ready for tomorrow. It can be hard sometimes to see anything positive or good in our life but once in a while we get little blessings that may not seem like a blessing to anyone else but us. And in those times we can see God smiling down at us, taking care of us. Have a blessed week!

cyber shopping

2011-10-07T06:27:00.000-07:00

I have this love hate relationship with eBay. I haven't gotten to actually try to sell something on there, although I probably should, but I do check it out often for the things I want to buy. It is funny how the bidding can make you go all crazy and you end up spending way more money than you wanted. Luckily it hasn't happened to me yet because there is always someone a lot more greedy than I am. :) But I love it how you can find the exact thing you're looking for on eBay. I have been looking for some dressy boots all over the stores I shop at but with the ugly styles (and in my opinion styles that will be gone in 2 years tops) that are out there right now I didn't see anything I had in mind. So I was really excited to find exactly the style I wanted in my size on eBay. But so did someone else who obviously has too much money to spend because they ended up paying way beyond my limit. So I was bummed but the next day, I found even better shoes, Ecco brand, all leather and somehow I was the only bidder so I got them for $8. I love good deals like that! I decided in my "old" age, it is so not worth it to buy cheap clothes and shoes. Rather, it is good to have a few pieces in the wardrobe that are high quality and with little finds like this on eBay it doesn't have to cost a fortune. For kids, I almost always buy second hand clothes and I haven't bought many on eBay because to me they usually are way overpriced. I don't think people look at the price and shipping together because if they did they would realize they could pay the same or less money for brand new clothes when they're on sale. So shopping around really pays off. It is harder the older the kids get because the second hand stores don't have nearly as much clothes for 7 years and up as they do for small kids so I do have to get some things in the stores and I do most of it online. I love free shipping from my favorite stores because I can pick the size I need, I don't have to drive two hours to get there, and if it doesn't work or fit I just bring it in and return it. I love online Christmas shopping too, my favorite place is Amazon but I did learn for toys you have to buy by the end of October or else the prices go up because they know people are buying for Christmas. So I have to say, I am so thankful for all the technology we have available to us because it makes living in a middle of Nowhere a lot easier and now when I go shopping for real I can just enjoy looking around and seeing what's there because I already bought everything I need online.

kite flying and so on

2011-10-06T20:06:00.000-07:00

This last week or two we've been having very warm temperatures, a couple days it was just a bit too hot for me but I held it together and suppressed the urge to complain because I know very well that we can go from 80 degrees one week to 30 degrees another. So there's no place for complaining, rather get those shorts and tank tops out again and enjoy the outside. So today, that is what we did for a while in the afternoon, with all the kiddos. It was so nice and warm outside (not too hot :)) and there was a strong wind. So of course, I had to pull out the kite and all the kids took turns flying it. It is such a simple and fun thing to do when there is a strong wind blowing. Kids, including the babies were squealing when the kite flew all around and they were trying to catch its long tail. Makes me smile when I picture it.

Today during my afternoon mini break (while the babies are napping) I was listening to one of my favorite Christian radio shows and I was convicted of something. They talked about a full enjoyment and contentment with our season of life. I think it is like a lot of things, when you're reminded of it you think "oh yeah, I should be doing that more" but then we get busy with all the stuff life throws at us daily and we forget. For me, the season of life right now is staying home with our kids, enjoying the short time I have with them and prepare them for life ahead. It is so easy to complain about how tired I am most days, or drained from the whole day with kids. It is easy to complain when I can barely remember I once had a job with adults where I could use my brain. It is easy to envy those around me who to me have it so much better and that is really where the discontentment comes from - comparing our life to others. I need to focus on our family and not what other people have or else I'll go through my whole life wishing I had a different life when I could have just enjoyed the beauty of my life that God gave specifically to me. With me, my big enemy is the chores around the house. I hate having a messy kitchen, a messy house, I like to provide home cooked meals for us on most days and I try really hard to keep up with it all but more times than not in my effort to do that I lose so many opportunities to comfort our kids, to hug them when they need it, to teach them a real lesson, to read or play with them for a few minutes. Is the "clean" house really worth losing all that? Because really, there is always something that is not quite done, laundry is hardly ever completely finished before I start the new loads, floors need washing all the time and all kinds of stuff so I am not winning there anyway. But I am not treasuring and fully enjoying moments with the kids the way I should and that bothers me. I'm not saying I should just quit all the work around the house and just sit and play with the kids all day. That's not it at all, but I want to find that balance in life so that 10, 20 years from now I don't look back and think why didn't I spend more time with the kids. They are so worth it and they are so hungry for our love. And the season is so different for everyone. It can be someone married with no kids for 10 years even though they've tried everything possible, or a single mom with little kids, having the last of the children leave home, etc. Whatever the season is we need to find our joy in it because God has a plan for us, a perfect plan that we need to be a part of and not watch it float away.

So here is to kite flying with the kids, listening to their giggles and laughs, comforting them when they're hurt or broken, showing them grace through all their mistakes just like God is showing grace to us every day (something I'm learning to do better now), being less tasks driven and more enjoyment driven, and give praise to the One no matter the season we're in.

That's enough sappy words. You can tell I just watched a sappy movie. I took our Kade to the movies tonight to see a movie which is a huge treat for him and there I saw a few babysitters taking other kids to the movies and I thought why wouldn't the parents want to make it special for their kids to take them themselves? Maybe I'm too old fashioned but I'd much rather have a date with my son and make him feel special, showing him I want to spend time with him, even if my free time can be pretty limited these days.

Here is one of my favorite songs that sums it up:

family time

2011-09-29T19:41:00.000-07:00

I guess I'm in a writing mood today. Kids just went to bed a little bit ago and Ehren is gone helping his brother with something. I wanted to say a few words about what has been on my mind lately. We live in this awfully over-scheduled society and no wonder we have no time to breathe. Family Life Today had someone talk about this topic recently and as I listened to them I kept thinking that's exactly what I've been thinking about lately. When you look at families regularly attending any church and how many of those families actually help in the church and get involved, it is a very sad picture. Everyone has the same excuse too - we're just too busy. Too busy doing what? Running kids around for their sports activities? Being on the computer or watching tv? I am so guilty of a lot of things that waste time, number one is this computer. I have to purposely turn the monitor off for a few hours and that way I give a lot more attention to everyone. But what bothers me the most is how our kids start at a very young age being so over-scheduled. Do they really need to be in everything available to them? Are they going to be better people because of it? I'm not going to lie, it is very tempting to fall into the trap of giving our children all our money can buy as far as education, sports and extra curricular activities but do they lose on something very important because of that? Do they miss out on family time, on dealing with their emotional needs, on treasuring their most important relationships?

I want to be purposeful when it comes to our time as a family. Maybe it is partly because taking care of all the kids during the day when the evening comes I want us to be us as a family. I love it when we have several nights in a row during the week when there's nothing going on. And I understand you can't get that all the time. You have to run errands some evenings, you have to go to some church meetings and activities, but I think if we're purposeful of our time it can be different. This year I was very purposeful with one night a week. Last year I helped with Awana on Wednesday nights which goes through the whole school year. I helped with 3 and 4 year-olds which is very hard to do in the evenings when they're all a bit tired. But I think it was extra hard on me because I was home alone with 5 little kids, 2 were babies, 5 days a week and on Wednesday nights I'd have to help with some more little kids. It was just too much and I felt really stressed most of that year. So this summer I said no more, with my job the way I am I cannot go to church after my work is done and spend more time with preschoolers. It was a hard decision because for a long time our church could not find anyone willing to step up to do that, but I thought I'd rather our church not have anything for 3 and 4 yr olds than me not being able to handle my life and family well. And I'm so glad I stood by my decision on that. It has only been a few weeks of Awana but having one extra night a week where I can recharge, exercise or get groceries means so much to me. Ehren and I might make some of those Wednesdays our date time too which is so hard to come by so I'm excited for that. Sometimes, even if it's hard I think we have to make a decision that looks bad on the outside but is the right thing for your family so it can grow and stay together. With the divorce rate higher than ever, it is not easy to keep our marriages and families strong but it has to be our priority after God or else nothing else will matter in the end. I'm trying to be intentional this year about "filling up my tank" so that my family gets a happier mom and a happier wife. Sometimes that means having my stay home mom friends come and have a play date with all the kids and enjoy fellowship when we can get it, or it means taking time for myself to work out or window shop, taking the time to blog and think out loud, taking time to play board games with our kids instead of watching a movie, going for walks as a family, having dinners together at home on most days, sitting down as a family before bed and just talk and laugh together, and so on. I hope you can find ways to keep your family going strong. Because our kids won't remember how many different sports they mastered, or how many kids they beat, but they will remember if their parents were there to listen when they were hurting, if their parents noticed that they really needed them in that one moment. And I really don't want to miss that moment with our children.

twins

2011-09-29T12:14:00.000-07:00

There was a time before I had any kids when I thought having twins would be so much fun. And I have no doubt the people that have them love it. But I feel like now I am getting a glimpse of what that is really like every step of the way. I watch Carson and Aveah during the week who are less than a month apart. Right now they are at 15 and 16 months old but I've watched them since 4 & 5 months old. I have to say this fall seems so much easier than last year. I am a lot more relaxed and sane most of the time :), things are a lot easier with them. The hardest thing must have been giving them bottles all day long, twice because neither of them wanted to hold the bottle until quite a bit later. And really that wouldn't be a big deal but when you have 3 other little kids to take care of and feed it gets to be a lot. So I am so happy that right now I can feed all the kids at the same time, my babies as I call them eat almost everything we eat and they are happily entertained by the other kids and toys. It is funny but every stage has its hard moments. Right now I am dealing with a little bit of messes everywhere. And it just dawned on me that if it's just one of them here you barely notice but you get both of them together and whatever one doesn't think of the other one will. :) Aveah likes splashing away in the toilet and with so many kids in the house it is pretty hard to keep the doors closed all the time, but we're doing better now after a couple pretty wet bathrooms and clothes. They both enjoy taking out all the toys they can get into and the tinier pieces the better and somehow they can make our kids' rooms look like a tornado hit them in about 5 minutes. And what's even better is stuff they can find and get into that are not toys. :) It hasn't happened much luckily (other than my absolute favorite and most treasured vase that broke) because the house is pretty baby proof and I don't have much stuff out in the open. I'm learning that even the little I have out I need to put away but that's the joys of double one year olds. :) Our day is sure interesting with them around and it changes so much the older they get. Now they love singing songs, rhymes, and reading simple books which is so nice to see from just a few months ago.

So I'm really glad God gave me this glimpse of the twins because no matter how cute they are, how attached to me they are and how much we all enjoy them, I sure am glad that they get to go home at the end of the day and they're also really excited to go to their moms and dads which is always fun for me to see. But no matter how hard some days are, I have to say it doesn't even come close to working outside of home and not be there for our kids during the day or right after they come home from school. I feel so blessed I am able to be there for them and even though it's so easy for me to say I wish I could just take care of our own children, when I look around me and see husbands and wives losing jobs and having to get out there and work full-time even if it's ripping their hearts apart, I remember what I have is so worth it. And I believe it is good for our kids too, to know that our house is shared with these other kids, they are a part of our family when they are here. They gain best friends to play with, they learn how to share easier and it is so fun to watch them really stand up for each other and take care of each other.

shock collar

2011-09-29T06:14:00.000-07:00

Funny how some silly things can make you happy. We have a dog named Charlie, a mix lab. A very dumb dog if you ask me. Can't learn any commands beyond "sit" and I pretty much gave up on him after a little while or a big while to me. I think it is mainly because I miss how our first dog was, so smart and obedient from the start and it's just not fun to go from that to our new dog. Charlie is pretty good with kids though, just loves anybody and as he's getting older he plays really well with them, with an occasional roughness. Our kids love him too and they are entertained by him for hours some days which is great to see. Kade is responsible for feeding him and our cat every day and I think it helps with feeling like this is his dog. The main problem and I think the only problem we have with Charlie is that he keeps running away. When we are not paying attention to him for a few minutes, there he goes on the road or across the field. Mainly he just wants to go see the dogs of our 2 closest neighbors and he comes back after a little while. I would have no problem with that but of course, we have to have one of those crazy neighbors and she said if the dog ever comes to their house again she's going to call the cops and shoot him too. Wow, really? The dog that wouldn't hurt a fly. But whatever, I just feel bad for Charlie because that ended his days of free running around. We tried the invisible fence and that didn't work at all. He would just run through it, get shocked and then would be terrified to go back to the fence area after that which only encouraged him to run away as far from it as he could. So now we have him chained up and just let him lose for a while when someone is with him, which really makes me feel bad but we haven't found a better solution so far. Then about a couple of weeks ago Ehren and I were browsing thru the sports store and we came up to a shelf of dog shock collars. We both thought, should we try this? It is not a cheap thing so it wasn't easy but I thought let's give it a try. Now, a few days after using it I feel like "why didn't we get this right away"? I absolutely love this thing! Finally, there is something that works when he's doing something bad. If he tries to run after the school bus now, I just warn or shock him and he turns around. If I go to the mail box Charlie would just go along and not just stay by me but would start running on the road ahead of me but now, with my remote in one hand I point to him and say "No, stay" and he just knows. He actually stays back and doesn't try to follow us out there even without a shock. I just can't say enough about my new toy. It feels like we have a totally different dog. He does have to get used to it more because after he does something bad like jumping on kids or going for the road and he gets shocked he gets all scared to do anything but I'm seeing he's getting better with that and is learning he can still do things after being shocked and when he's good we reward him. I just feel good about Charlie being able to run around most of the day now without having to worry about where he ran now and did he visit the crazy neighbors. So that is my story for today, the shock collar that put a smile to my face. I know, I am a pretty mean person taking joy out of someone's suffering and I bet there would be many animal rights people that would love to get after me but I don't care. If it helps our dog have a better life with an occasional pain, I'm all for it.

our Fall walk with Charlie this weekend

Anika's 5th Birthday

2011-09-24T19:36:00.000-07:00

Anika is turning 5 this coming Tuesday so we had a little girls' birthday party for her today. She was so excited to have her own birthday party after seeing Kade having his with the boys. She loved all the decorations we were putting up, the table we did, the goody bags we made for the girls, just such a little girl. Since 4 of her girl cousins live close by right now we invited them, nana and 2 friends (sisters) from our church. Ani doesn't know too many girls her age from church because most of the kids her age are boys so this worked out great. We played a little nail polish game, made crowns and eatable necklaces. The girls and our 2 boys were so excited the whole time that they just went from one thing to the next and they couldn't wait to do the next thing, so that was funny to watch. After we were all done they also couldn't wait to play outside and they were playing princesses in the woods since they were all wearing their crowns. Ehren just started to make a path for the kids in the woods this weekend and our kids just love the little trail he made so far. So they were in there for quite a while. It was a pretty lively and exciting party to say the least. I think it was great and so fun to create memories like that for the kids. Anika has been wanting real fish for a while and since dad said no to that (and I was only glad) I at least had to make a fish birthday cake for her. I think it's not on her mind much anymore though and she wasn't sad at all she couldn't get the fish so that's good. I am really happy that Ani's teacher has goldfish in their preschool classroom and she loves watching them there, so at least she gets them there. By the time bedtime came tonight, all 3 kids were so ready to crash and so am I. :)

It is just hard to believe that our little Anika is growing up so fast and is 5 already. She is becoming her own person and it is so interesting to watch her develop into a precious unique little girl. I love that she is such a girl and loves all the girly things. Her and Kason are such great buddies when it's just the 2 of them and I love watching them when they sit on the bed or couch together, Anika reading a book after book to Kason. Or they will play mom and dad, trains, dolls and just seem to be so close. I was trying to remember from my childhood if I ever did that with my brother Erik who I was the closest to. All I remember from early years are the fights and chasing and our oldest brother Marcel who had to intervene and be in charge of us a lot (which reminds me a lot of how our Kade is) so I love seeing Ani and Kason getting along so well for the most part. Ani loves taking care of him, she is just so natural at it which I don't think she gets from me. :) She is also very independent, very much unlike Kade. She could care less that she was leaving me behind when getting on the bus to her preschool. On one hand it is sad to see she doesn't need me as much anymore but on the other hand I'm glad because I know she loves it and can't get enough of social interaction. It is so different from how Kade was his first year of school, just shy and homesick, which he still gets like sometimes. But our Ani is a little social butterfly, she feels best surrounded by kids and most of all she loves school and everything about school. She's just such a blessing to us and brings so much to our little family. I love my little girl and am so thankful that God let me have her in the midst of our 2 boys. I just pray we can always be close, even through those tough teenage years.

yeah, lots of sweets but after all, it is for girls. :)

5k with Kade

2011-09-17T11:18:00.000-07:00

In the light of my last post, I decided to run a 5k with Kade that happened today. It is an annual run in our little Thief River Falls so it is a pretty small race with not very many participants, so a good chance to win. :) Anyway, I like running the 10k which they have at the same time but with my not so regular running these past months I didn't want to just finish it and get a bad time. It is funny because if I'm going to enter a race I have to do semi good ( that is semi good for me which means a good chance to beat my best time) or else I don't want to do it. First, all races cost quite a bit of money and to me there is no point wasting money when I know I'll do horrible and I might as well run that on my own. But that's just me, I know other people look at it differently. So the thought hit me this week, that this is the perfect opportunity to run with Kade because I wouldn't feel bad that I missed my race and I can just do this for him and with him. So I told him yesterday that we're going to do something fun together. :) Truthfully, it started out with crying about it but later on he was telling nana that tomorrow he's running a race with me so I guess it didn't take him too much to convince him, I just had to give him some time. He thought there is no way he could run the whole 5k (or 3.12 miles) but I kept encouraging him and telling him it's ok to walk some. To my surprise he did awesome. I had to tell him to slow down a few times but then at the end I thought maybe he was able to go faster. He did walk a couple times but only for a few seconds and he was right back to running. He passed 2 girls around his age (and the only kids under 11 that ran) and he was really pumped about that. Then as we approached the finish line Ehren was standing there with Ani and Kason and Kade just ran hard at that point. I had to almost sprint to catch up so I was right behind him when he crossed the finish. It was so much fun to do it with Kade and to see how much confidence it gave him. Of course, kids under 11 run for free and so they don't get any medals or even mentioning about how they did which I think is a bummer because kids like Kade would love to be acknowledged for the hard work they did. So when he accepted the fact he won't be getting a medal he was telling me "mom, maybe you'll get a medal". And I told him oh no, there were much faster ladies than me and maybe I could have gotten a medal if I tried running fast by myself, but I didn't care about the medal, I wanted to do it with Kade. And sure enough, they call my age group and I got a 2nd place so I got a medal. Unbelievable! :) Those faster ladies were all younger or running 10k. But since Kade got a faster time than me I gave him my medal. He so deserved it. We made it together in 33 minutes and a few seconds which I think is really great for Kade's first 5k ever. I personally would like to beat 22 minutes some day but the few races I run I usually do a longer distance so I don't know if I'll ever work on my 5ks again. Maybe when I'm too old and limpy to run any longer. :) It was just an awesome experience to do it with my son and it meant so much more to me than a ton of races I've ran by myself. I hope he'll really enjoy running as he gets older so we can continue to have our running times and racing times together.

Fall running

2011-09-15T18:30:00.000-07:00

Yes, the Fall is finally here! My brother Adam and his wife Slavka left this week (and there were some pretty sad kids in our house after that) and with them they took our warm weather. Actually, I'm not complaining at all because this is my favorite season in Minnesota. The trees are the most beautiful shades of yellow, red and brown (not yet though), the air is crispy and fresh, and we usually have more sunny days than not. I think since I've lived here in MN I changed my attitude towards the Fall because from what I remember in Slovakia it was mostly gloomy and very rainy with occasional beautiful days. But here most Falls are just beautiful and so appreciated after some hot and muggy days. I think that my main reason for loving the Fall though is because of running. I cannot compare running in the Fall to anything else, it is the most invigorating thing to me. I just got done with my 4 mile run in the most beautiful Fall weather and it reminded me how much I missed it. Sure, my run felt like a cripple trying to do it since I haven't done any running for a while but at the same time I loved it and was thankful for the occasional cars towards the end that made me straighten up so I would at least look like I have been running every day. :) I loved the crispy air, the perfect temperature, the sunshine. I used to laugh with some old colleagues about my need for a perfect temperature while running. It couldn't get above 65 and below 10 Fahrenheit or about there. I got it down to a few degrees and not that I couldn't run in warmer or cooler temperatures, it just wouldn't feel as good and I would have a hard time keeping my pace then. So anyway, Fall temperatures are exactly my kind of temperatures for running - not too cold and not too warm. I really hope I can get more organized with my time at home these few months so I can find the time for my running outside because the vicious winter is going to be here before we know it :) and that means being stuck with the treadmill for running. It is funny how when there is something out of ordinary going on in my life, like my brother visiting us, the first thing that I let go off is my time to work out. I wonder why that is and I always felt a little jealous of women who are always able to take that time for themselves, even when they have company staying with them. I feel really guilty about it for some reason, but I shouldn't. Because in the long run, it gives so much more back to me, better health, more confidence, better attitude with kids and my husband, and some precious time to think, to daydream, to pray. So my tiny resolution for this Fall is to find more time for me to work out and run because it is what I need and it is what my lovelies need from me.

The school is here!

2011-09-09T06:54:00.000-07:00

And so the long awaited school year finally came. Kade started 3rd grade and Anika preschool. It was a bit of a rough start since we missed the official first day of school being on our little trip and the next day Kade got a croup cough so he had to stay home. That day Ehren just took Anika to school by herself. The next day Kade was all ready to go to school and had so much fun there. It was the first year he wasn't homesick on the first day and came home excited saying "I didn't even cry one bit mom!" My boy is sure growing up, he needs me less and less every day it seems like. Anika loves school and was so ready to go. She really is almost the age of other kindergarten kids but she misses the Sept 1st cut-off so that's really why she really loves it and it doesn't even faze her that she's away from home. The school is having major problems with their busing though and my poor Ani was on the bus for almost 2 hours the first day. Today I'm going to pick her up because of that and even though the teacher was saying how they're going to work it out, I don't think I want to wait until they try to do the changes and will just keep picking her up. The bus is on time and doesn't take long in the morning at all, just after preschool is over.

So today was the first day when Kade and Ani went on the bus together and they were so cute. Kade loves to take care of Anika when he's on his own, he likes to be in charge and be the responsible one. That love is not shown as much when we're home :) but at least I know he is good with her when I'm not there. Poor Kason was so hurt this morning though and when I tried to tell him I'll be right back in the house after the bus leaves he insisted he's going with us to the driveway in his pyjamas. He was excited for a while about the bus coming and then when he started to realize they're going on the bus and he has to stay home he got really upset. He just cried and cried that he wanted to go on the bus. The funny thing is that I know he'd do just fine in a preschool on his own, he's so ready but he will have to wait until he's 4. I am pretty sure he'll be crying about going to school next year on the days there is no preschool because it is only 3 times a week. I am really glad his cousin Emily comes to our house on the days Ani goes to preschool because they play really well together and he doesn't feel alone. But at the same time I think he does like a little time alone with me because he gets so much more of my attention, playing with him and doing things with him that he doesn't get when all the kids are at our house. They're all just growing up so fast, it is hard to believe it sometimes.

Ani's first day

in her classroom

she loves the goldfish

Kade and Ani ready to get on the bus together for the 1st time

Kason would not leave their side

instead of helping Ani get up there here I am, taking pictures

and they're gone

Adam and Slavka

2011-09-08T20:22:00.000-07:00

It is a historic moment for me right now because my brother Adam and his wife Slavka came to visit us. He's the second brother that made it over here. They rented a car in DC where Slavka's sister lives and drove all the way here. They will stay with us for a few more days and will drive all the way back to DC. It was really strange (and nice) having them drive to our house on a regular Friday night because every time any member of my family comes to visit we have to make a trip to the airport, at least 2 hours away. And we've just been having such a nice time with them. Our kids love playing with Adam and Slavka because they understand and talk in English and Ani especially has been so goofy with them. They're just really enjoying their company. And we are too. I know Ehren loves visiting with them because it's so easy to talk to them and he's really enjoyed getting to know both of them. So a part of their stay with us we wanted to show them something more beautiful than TRF (because in my mind you cannot fly thousands of miles and all you see is TRF :)) and what could be a better place than Duluth and the North Shore? Ehren and I love going there in the fall and since they are here now we went a bit earlier but it was such a nice trip. The weather was so gorgeous in comparison to the times we went before where in October we had to wear hats and mittens because it was too cold. The kids loved it too and they were all able to do the little hikes with us. By the end, we were running out of time and food so we decided to head home even though Ehren and I wanted to keep going and look at more places. We decided from now on we need to make it a priority for our family to go every year and experience a new hiking place each time. I have to say it's the most beautiful place in Minnesota and it feels like you're in the hills and at the ocean at the same time. After we got home, Adam and Slavka have been cruising our neighborhood, doing some geocaching, playing with the kids and so on. I'm so glad the weather has been just beautiful and warm for their trip and it is supposed to cool down right as they will be heading back. Here are a bunch of pictures so far but I might put more on here from our busy weekend ahead with the Hanson family and church friends.

eating their chocolate eggs from babka

playing lots of fun games together

we went to the cabin for one night before heading up to Duluth

Kason got a ride on this motorcycle and just loved it

Kade was wondering if we could find gold in this creek because of the color :)

getting old

2011-08-29T16:36:00.000-07:00

Well, you know you're getting old when you start forgetting important belongings places. In the last week I managed to forget my purse somewhere twice! Yikes, that is awful and scary. The first place was church so I wasn't worried but today was a different story. Me and the kids stopped at a park in town really quick and I have no idea why I even brought the purse out of the van, but of course I put it down right away as I was helping Kason and Ani climb rocks and different things. Normally I wouldn't leave it there but we were the only ones at the playground so who cares. Well, no one if you remember to pick it up as you're leaving. I waited for a train to cross for about 15 minutes on the way out, drove all the way to our house and that's when I realized in horror the purse is gone. I look at the clock, it's a couple minutes after 5pm so I frantically call Ehren (because it would take him less time to get there from work) who works till 5 and when I finally reach him he's still at his desk but ran right out the door to go get it. Just minutes after I hung up with Ehren our phone rings. Someone says "We found your purse" and I can't even believe it. I just have this big smile on my face and keep saying "thank you so much". They waited until Ehren got there too which was so nice. It just shows there are people out there who care. I also started thinking, would I ever see my beautiful leather purse from Italy if we lived in a big city or even if I was back in Slovakia? Most likely not. So it made me really grateful for our tiny town, even though I know bad things can happen anywhere. My husband is probably worried the most right now, where is she going to leave her purse next? :) So I better work on that, but for now, I'll be happy and thankful for the nice people that found my purse, what a lovely blessing.

August

2011-08-25T09:25:00.000-07:00

As our kids are becoming school aged, I start having pretty mixed feelings about the month of August. Part of me wants to enjoy the last days of summer with the kids, the beautiful weather outside and then there is part of me that cannot wait for the school to start. Seriously, 3 months of school off is way too long for the kids. They need structure and learning and "jobs" to do and seems to me that every year since Kade started going to school by the time August hits I can just tell he needs school in his life. I'd be more than ok with having an extra week off of school sometime in the Spring and cut their summer break short. I just think we all become lazy, including me. My daily routine is messed up, the preschool age kids don't listen as well because of having two 8 year old boys at home during the day, and I think in some ways we are just tired of no daily plans. I know it is mostly my fault and I should be ready to do structured activities with them and really, all June and July seems to go great and we have lots of fun but then that August hits and I run out of steam or something. :) Kids drive me crazy, I can't think of anything productive to do with all of them at the same time and am pretty much waiting for September so they would go to school already and I can once again have my alone time with the preschool kids, return to the organized days and everything. It is only about one more week now before the school starts and it is great to see the end of the tunnel but also to remind myself to enjoy the nothingness of these days because they will soon be gone and we are going to be running around way too much soon enough. I do love our week nights at home now, very relaxed and no rushing to go places and I will miss that for sure. But even if I will miss some quiet evenings, I am so ready for school to start. And I am ready for church to start. :) As if there was no church during the summer, but some of you know what I'm talking about. It's nice when everyone starts showing up on Sundays again, when we can plan things and be proactive with new people that come. I'm really looking forward to that this year and that's part of why I'm ready for the school year to start. So here's to another week of laziness and hopefully enjoying the days I get to spend with all these precious kids at home.

Kade's birthday party

2011-08-22T20:24:00.000-07:00

I finally sat down today and I could fall asleep right now but I had to at least share these pictures because the rest of the week does not look any less busy. Tonight we had a lovely birthday party for our Kade who is turning 8 this Saturday. It was so fun to watch his little buddies just enjoy their time together. The giggles, running around, laughing and having a good time together made all our effort worth it. And it also made me think, in this day and age when so many parents try to outdo the last birthday party their kids went to, you really don't need much for the kids to have a great time. Yeah, the all Martha Stewart looking parties are cute and so put together, it all has a theme and every little detail is thought out, but in the end what really matters is if the kids enjoy their company, have a good time together and if they can just be kids. So we really didn't do that much, just a few sports games outside like an obstacle course, a soccer dribble and shoot course, running a lap around our house and the boys really enjoyed those and getting prizes for winning. After they ate we did a treasure hunt with 8 clues and they were so excited to figure out the clues. In the "treasure" there were some candy treats and a treat bag for each boy to take home. And the birthday cake was a huge success again and it is somehow becoming a tradition of mine to come up with the perfect cake for our child for that specific year and what they're into. I knew for a long time I wanted to do a figure 8 cake to symbolize Kade's 8th year but he has been telling me how much he wanted a Super Mario Brothers cake so I got the idea of buying the little cake toppers. The boys all loved the little toys and it worked out perfectly that they each could keep one to take home. They are also fun to play with because you pull them back and they shoot out really fast. So they had fun with racing those on our laminate floor. Overall, just a great fun birthday party and I am so thankful Kade has these boys in his life to call friends because they're just sweet boys and they love having fun together. I hope they can stay close friends for a long time.

races

loking for clues

excited to go get the next clue

looking for the treasure

They got it

the Super Mario Brothers cake

today in pictures

2011-08-12T05:40:00.000-07:00

Today (actually written yesterday :)) - just an ordinary day and an ordinary evening. And yet a little something that made me smile and made me grab the camera. I found these in our little garden. And when I say little, I mean Little. Actually, I don't think I've seen anyone around here say they have a garden and not have a huge piece of land designated to all kinds of vegetables and berries you can think of. But today I don't care. Today I have a tiny produce from my tiny garden and it is sooo juicy and sweet. I am so thankful our kids love to eat cucumbers, peppers and tomatoes just freshly cut, no hiding them in some salsa, salad or spaghetti sauce.

The peppers are taking off, even though it seems like we have 3 or 4 different types of them growing and it is hard to know when a pepper is ready to pick.

Flowers are still blooming nice, even the one on the right will bloom soon that appeared totally dead last year.

and today we had our usual weekly meal for dinner - homemade pizza. I used to make just one pan but with our growing kids, we only have a few pieces left now when I make 2 big pans. :) I love making my own dough and for years I had no idea just how very simple it is to make it. I also don't remember the last time we ordered a pizza just for our family and I'm so happy about that because this is so much healthier and so so much cheaper.

family time

2011-08-11T17:48:00.000-07:00

It was a very busy weekend for us as we had our Hanson family reunion at the cabin. All 4 kids and their families got together for a weekend which means 4 couples, nana and papa, and 9 grandchildren. It is too bad I didn't take more pictures but frankly there was no time. Ehren and I rented a cabin with Brent and Ingrid and our 5 kids which helped a little so we weren't all cramped under one roof. Yet somehow, with the ages of all of our kids (anywhere from 1 to 8 years old), no matter what a person does it is exhausting. :) I feel like I'm pretty used to big commotion at our house with taking care of 7 kids all by myself, but it wiped even me out. I was so glad to get home to our quiet house and do nothing. There was a moment when I just sat on a couch and stared out the window for a while and couldn't get myself to do anything. Just recharging. All the adults were worn out by the end and the kids were overly tired because of skipping naps and not getting enough rest at night. Yet at the same time it was so fun to watch the little cousins having a blast together and enjoying every moment of the weekend. There was fishing, swimming, gathering shells, tubing, running, laughing, eating, birthday party, Sunday family church and so on. At one point, I think it was while the kids were having a time of their life on the tubes, I couldn't help but think how our kids are growing up so quick and pretty soon we'll be getting together like this, except our kids will be teenagers and will be so independent from us. So I don't mind the craziness and the fussiness of the tired babes because it lets me know they still need me, their mom. They still depend on me, they still want to be nurtured by me, they want me to watch every little new thing they get to do and it is good. It is how it's supposed to be. Since Ehren's brother Seth and his family live in New York state it is a very rare occasion when we get to see them and it was so nice to be around them again. It is also fun to watch their children grow and become their own persons and to interact with them again. We are so blessed to have such a big and healthy family and I really hope I never take any of them for granted.

kids swimming even if all the adults were too cold to get in

resting and warming up after the swim

lots of fishing

Emily and Ani

Brent and Ingrid with girls and Kjell fishing

Sage loving the tube

Seth in the water with all the kiddos

Kade and Sarah

Sage and Kade

one of our meals together

all 9 cousins together - Adam(4), Clare (3), Kason (3), Sarah (7), Kade (8), Aveah (1), Sage (5), Ani (4), Emily (4)

decorate your own cupcake

enjoying the treat

Kason after the cupcake

my 3 blessings

2011-07-26T17:43:00.000-07:00

Can't believe this was almost 2 years ago!

It is almost 7, kitchen is a mess after we just devoured a very tasty meal and I sat down to catch a few blog updates. Yes, I know. How can I sit down before the dishes are all put away? But as I was reading, something made me stop and listen to the sound of my house. Our kids are actually enjoying their time together in the basement, just squealing and laughing for the past half hour. This sound, even though it can be pretty distracting or annoying, right now sounds like a heavenly music to my ears. It is so nice to listen to our kids having a good time with each other, without us trying to coach them thru it, or telling them what they should be doing together. :) They are growing up so quickly and it seems like we are already entering the next stage of life - kids beyond toddler/preschool age. Even though technically both Kason and Ani are considered preschool age it feels like they're older and so much more mature. We can talk about more things, expectations, rules, feelings and somehow it feels so freeing. I enjoyed every new steps our kids have taken and it seems like I am still enjoying the new steps they're taking. It is nice to watch who they are becoming, how they're forming into their own little persons. I think watching 2 one year olds all day during the week is really making me appreciate my own kids and being thankful we are over that stage. None of it was bad, but when they get to certain age it is really fun to do things with them, taking them places and watching their excitement. And now is that stage. I must say it is my favorite when all 3 are becoming more equal and capable to do things together. Of course, every stage has its many challenges. Life would be pretty boring without them but today I am going to be thankful for where we are and where our precious children are. They can be so sweet and so well behaved sometimes. :) I am pretty happy that pre-teen or teenage years are still ways away and I pray once they come we have the wisdom and love with each of our kids so they never feel alone or lost in this world.

It really feels as if God spoke to me just now. I had a pretty rough day, I could just feel getting worn out emotionally from taking care of 7 kids and started getting frustrated about everything. But all of a sudden I could not help but smile at my kids, or at the sounds of my kids and just feel happy and blessed that I am their mom. It is a privilege God gives me every day and not a burden or a pain. Thank you Lord for this reminder. I love my little family.

mini vacation

2011-07-21T18:38:00.000-07:00

I can't even remember the last time our whole family had a vacation other than a 3 day weekend here and there. It is sad we don't get to have time away more often but hopefully we'll be able to more in the future. This last weekend though we finally managed to have a few days away together as a family and it was so wonderful. We all needed some time together and it was perfect. We managed to do a lot of things in the short time but at the same time it felt so restful.

We started off the weekend by going to the cabin where Ehren's mom's family had their annual family reunion. We stayed there until Saturday afternoon and enjoyed some lake time. After that we went down to the Cities and stayed with Ehren's aunt's family who we love staying with. We always have such a nice and relaxing time there. Of course, we had to do some fun things with the kids over the 4 days we were there and they had a blast. We went to the children's museum, Mall of America and Rainforest Cafe, boat ride on lake Minnetonka, we swam in the lake and pool, did a little shopping, I met up with an old friend, and finally Ehren and Kade got to their most anticipated Twins game. It felt so nice to have more time down there and not rush through a quick weekend like we usually do when we're there.

As it happens, the Children's museum has free admissions for all every 3rd Sunday of the month so that was a no brainer to me. Both Ehren and I braced ourselves for the craziest place on Earth, especially when we kept being warned about no strollers allowed inside on the 3rd Sunday. But to our surprise (and probably due to a 100 degree weather outside) it was the emptiest I have seen it the few times we've been there. We never had to stay in line for anything, the kids got to try all the things right away so it was just a win win. Kason loved exploring all the things there and wanted to try everything. To my surprise he was the sweetest boy to all the kids there and was so polite. However, we did have to remind him a few times over the weekend that we don't talk to strangers. :) He just has no fear of anyone or anything. Afterwards we drove to Mall of America with the kids, went to see Legoland and to eat at the Rainforest Cafe. The Rainforest Cafe was pretty cool for the kids, but I decided it is enough to go there like every 5-10 years. :) Our poor little Kason was getting so tired though as we were waiting for the food. He skipped his nap the day before and was up pretty early. He was so good though, no crabbiness at all which is what I was expecting, just very tired and he wanted to be held as we walked a little bit around the mall. So after we walked around the Nickelodeon park for a while we went back to the house so we could all rest the remainder of the day.

On Monday Ehren's uncle Kevin took us on their boat on lake Minnetonka which we always enjoy. There are the most magnificent houses there to look at and also a big mixture of houses, new and old and you could drive a boat around the lakes for a week to see everything. It was so hot though we had to stop and cool off in the lake and the kids just loved that because there was a nice sand by the shore. Really, just as a big welcome back to the Cities from "way up North" it was the hottest weekend of the year with a record high for humidity and heat index, which was kind of funny. I really wanted to do some outdoor stuff like going to Como zoo and some parks but it was way too hot to do anything other than being in the water or in the air conditioned buildings. But in the end, we did plenty of stuff and doing more would just make the trip crazy for all of us.

Ehren and Kade got to go to their very first Twins game at the new stadium and they were so excited to go. Well, Ehren was the one sooo excited to go and Kade didn't quite know what to expect. Poor guys though, it was very muggy out but at least it was in the evening so it was bearable. Ehren had a blast there and Kade enjoyed it a lot despite being so hot. The rest of us had a chance to witness a very fun photo shoot at Ehren's aunts' place during the game. It was a shoot for a bridal magazine, a wedding idea for a Southern wedding, Kentucky Derby style. They had a model who posed for a bride and created the most beautiful table outside, with fresh flowers, table settings and all the tiny little details. They also had a little dessert table and that was cute too. The bride also posed with their 3 horses. I could not believe how many people and how much effort goes into just a few pictures you see in a magazine. They worked in the 100 degree weather from around 3pm until 8pm, just crazy. They were very thankful for being able to use the air conditioned house for short breaks and for storing flowers, food, etc.

So I have to say it was one of our most successful trips since child #3 where everybody was happy and had a great time. It is so fun to create memories like this with our kids, now that they're old enough to understand and remember what we've done. Now back to our craziness we go, but at least another weekend is almost here.

children's museum - working hard

Cousins and a friend at the cabin

fun water play

on the "metro transit" bus

Ani loved it

Kason busy helping all the kids at the "restaurant"

Kason did not build this by the way but he loved digging in the piles of legos

this is an actual standing castle in Germany

had to get a picture with "Oh Mac Donald", the way Kason calls him

we had an aquarium next to our table

lots of fish to look at

Legoland at MOA

Ani loved Kai-lan

looking at the many rides at the mall but we didn't go on any

Kevin taking us on lake Minnetonka

stopped at a place ride off the dock and the kids just inhaled their hamburgers

fun time at the pool

the Twins stadium

so excited for the game

this is how hot it was - look at the sweat up close

cell phone age

2011-07-15T06:57:00.000-07:00

Even though I refuse to accept it we all live in a cell phone world. All over the world people use cell phones and so many can't live without them. I don't have anything really against them, but I have never been impressed by them or felt a need for it. Actually the one time I really needed it, traveling by myself with Anika, in the middle of a rain storm and the van dying with no houses or anything for about a mile and I didn't have reception. But some nice guys stopped and helped me out in minutes so really, did I even need it then? I think people are so quick to justify "needing" one when in fact, the world goes on without them.

Ever since we were married, or I should say ever since I started driving by myself (which was 1 or 2 years after we were married) I had a cell phone. Mainly because the company I worked for paid for it so why not and it was my emergency phone only. Ehren could tell you how emergency it was because any time he wanted to get a hold of me he couldn't because I had it off. If I used 10 minutes a month that was a lot. Maybe it has to do with the way I grew up because phone calls were so expensive growing up we barely used it. So I never got into the mode of chatting with girlfriends for hours on the phone like many Americans did. I know, now it is more just texting versus talking but still a lot of my generation loves talking on the phone and everywhere I go I listen to their very chatty conversations that I just wouldn't have over the phone. I guess I'm not a phone person even though if I don't get to see someone in a long time, like my sister-in-law we could talk on the phone for a long time, or I should say a long time for me. :)

Anyway, after we moved up north I knew I didn't want a cell phone because of how ridiculously expensive it is but to have a peace of mind I got a "tracfone", mainly because of how bad our vehicles are and so I can get a hold of Ehren if something happened. So I've had that for 5 years now and never once thought I needed anything else. It is actually nice when I drive for an hour to just sit in silence versus trying to think of who I need to call to not "waste" any minute of my day. I never even gave that number to anyone because it is off most of the time and I never check messages. And that's how I like it. I like being free of people when I go somewhere, when I try to escape my life for a bit. On the other hand, if I need to get a hold of someone, like my husband, it is nice to have it and be able to use it.

The reason I write about this is because last night once again I came to one of those times when my minutes expired and I needed a new card for the phone, which is probably 3 times a year or so. I never put those minutes on there because it is a pain in the butt and when Ehren was reminding me of this yesterday I said maybe I should just get a new phone to make it easier. So on my grocery run to Walmart I checked out the phones and to my surprise I found one for just $10 that has everything I'll ever need. You should see how obsolete my 5 year old phone looks, you can't even find one of those anywhere. And I think this was the first time in my life I was actually excited about a new cell phone, one that has more than 3 ring tones. :) I still doubt I will use it more than until now because I just don't travel that much but it is nice to have a more user friendly phone.

So that is the story of my cell phone life. I even have texting now so beware, I might just text Ehren sometime. Although, for the few minutes each month I call him it really doesn't matter that texting is cheaper. It is funny because even my mom over the years have become so efficient in using a cell phone and texting to everyone. Over there cell phones are the way to go though, they are way cheaper than in the US. I just cannot justify paying over $60 a month for the very basic cell phone plan when I can spend $10 and have everything I need in a cell phone. But I am beginning to think I have to step up my game here a bit because by the time our kids are teenagers which is not that far out, I'll have to use it to be able to reach them and talk to them.

So here is to another 5 years if this phone will last that long. For the most part though, I am an e-mail girl. When I have so many kids during the day there is hardly a quiet moment and every time I get on the phone one of them has to start screaming on top of their lungs and if I e-mail, I can just do that no matter the noise. :) And it is also way easier to get to the point in the e-mail, not overreact and compose my thoughts together.

what moms get excited about sometimes

2011-07-12T21:25:00.000-07:00

It's been one of those days, a little bit on a crazy side. I knew I wanted to get a lot done in the house before the day started but lately that doesn't mean half of those things actually get accomplished. The last few weekends we've been gone and so my time to attain to the house quickly diminished since weekends are the only time I have big chunks of time to clean the stuff that otherwise doesn't get cleaned. Week nights are way too short and I'm usually way too tired to start laundry or wash floors after 9pm. So our house was starting to look pretty bad and I was feeling it inside and out. I think even though I am not the most clean person in the world, my mom sure is and growing up with that must have done something to me because I cannot completely relax and enjoy myself until the house is clean. I try very hard to not let it bother me but eventually I can't take it anymore. :) And that day was today. I knew I had to do something before we leave for another long weekend on Friday and another weekend that nothing was going to get done. Now it is after 10pm and I am pretty happy with what I've done. There for sure is need for more and there always will be and if my mom was here she still couldn't stop at 10pm because such and such needs to get done. But for now I'll be happy with the tiny progress I made.

I watched 7 kiddos all day today, which is a typical number during the summer. Two 1 year olds, one 3 year old, two 4 year olds and two 7 year olds. I was very thankful for the beautiful sunshine and cooler temperature because 5 out of 7 kids played outside most of the day which gave me some time to clean. Loads of laundry got done and folded, kitchen got all cleaned up, bills and office stuff got organized, garage swept, fed the kids 3 times and a few bottles to the babies, worked with one of the babies who refuses to crawl at 12 months old, read with the kids and built with legos, cleaned up the kids rooms with the kids, played outside with all the kids for a while, was teaching Kason how to go potty outside like a big boy, tried to explain to him we cannot pick the bell peppers from the garden before they are ready (but at least he ate it), made 2 big homemade pizzas for dinner, e-mailed back and forth with Ehren a million times during the day about what we should do about refinancing, later this evening I filled out a form online for that, vacuumed most of the rooms, put the kids to bed, washed all the hardwood and tile floors. I think that is about it except for countless interruptions of sweet little faces either informing me about who is doing what, crying after a fight, telling me so and so is not sharing, etc. I guess it was a full day and not a dull day even though nothing exciting happened, I didn't even get out of the house. But sometimes, little things can bring satisfaction and excitement. Like sitting in the fresh clean kitchen, a peaceful house and just me with my thoughts. Good night to all and hope you had a full day today with your kind of excitement.

Here are some pictures from the last weekend. We really enjoyed the lake at my in-laws' cabin. The kids and our dog just wanted to swim and swim.

Kason is so fun to watch in the water. He's our fish.

my 4 lovelies

strawberry farm close to the cabin

where I ran into a dear friend who now lives in Kansas so we don't ever see each other

our hand picked strawberries, most of them are frozen already

our soccer life

2011-06-24T06:17:00.000-07:00

Kade has loved playing soccer since he was 3 years old. Up here it means playing soccer in the summer time for about 2 months. When he was younger, the week after the soccer season ended he would start asking when he can play soccer again. I felt pretty bad for him that for the most of the year he can't play it and for probably half the year he can't even try to play with his friends because it's too cold for it. As Kade is getting older he is starting to really love this sport and he really appreciates and enjoys every moment of it. It is so fun to watch him blossom in it and this year must be the first time that I'm thinking to myself " wow, he is really good!" And that is something for me to say because I'd be the first one to not give out any false compliments to my kids. But watching Kade out there is so fun because he is pretty good and he is trying so hard. Of course, he's no Maradona but I am surprised at how much of a natural talent he has when he really doesn't play the sport that much throughout the year. It is so funny because here is me, a mom who is very much against parents pushing their kids into all kinds of sports, and having their lives evolve around those sports, yet a part of me is sad Kade will never have an opportunity to play soccer on a higher level. We also try to be careful around Kade so he doesn't get too big of a head but he just thrives on acknowledgments. Some adult was telling him what a great soccer player he is and after scoring his first few goals he wanted to know what his chances of becoming a professional soccer player were. I pretty much told him his chances are super slim since where we live it's either hockey or baseball and I'm guessing Kade will not be playing either of those. We ruled out hockey right away because of financial reasons and the commitment and sacrifices our whole family would have to make for it. And baseball so far has always been during the day and I can't possibly drive Kade to town every day for that so that's the reason he can't do it. That leaves him with soccer but I am NOT complaining, plus he's probably best at it from doing any other sports.

I've always loved soccer. My 2 older brothers played soccer with friends from the young age and since I had to tag along with them they would either put me in one of the goals or I'd get to play with them. Neither team wanted to pick me, of course, since I was a girl but I am pretty sure I got quite good at it eventually. My oldest brother Marcel actually played on a soccer team for a number of years (I think he broke his arm 3 times doing it) and somehow watching Kade reminds me so much of him. The moves he has, the focused look. Kade's facial expressions remind me of Marcel anyway but when he's playing soccer it sometimes feels like I'm going back in time (minus the TRF team dress shirt) and am looking at my brother. :) Or a quite shorter version of my brother. Kade is one of the youngest kids on the team and he is one of the shortest but he's also one of the fastest. So here we are, Ehren and I as proud as can be of Kade and we are entering the world of the soccer families. The thing about it is that it's not a drag for me at all to go to the games. I love watching Kade improve and have little pep talks during and afterwards. Ehren loves it just as much and even though this year he's not coaching Kade he might start again next summer. Anika already said she wants to play soccer next year so we will see how it goes for her. She's the kind of person who will enjoy anything in the world that happens with other kids, but truthfully she is not very athletically gifted. I will never discourage her from doing something because she may not be very good at it though. It makes me smile sometime just to watch her struggle with things other kids can do so easily, yet it doesn't bring her down at all. She is just excited to be in their company and excited to be trying something new. And I just love that about our Ani, I have so much to learn from her already. :)

So to see a glimpse of our soccer adventure, here are some pictures and video clips. At Kade's age they use these little goals with no goalie but next year it should be the bigger size goals - if they let Kade get in with the rest of his class mates. According to the birthday cut-off he shouldn't be in this group, but I'd want him to go to a higher level and stay there an extra year so he gets better practice there, but we'll see.

this little boy tripped Kade 3 times as he was about to score. Pretty frustrating but I guess that's how they play at that age.

Just some pictures

2011-06-23T20:21:00.000-07:00

Here are a few pictures from our first trip to the cabin this year. It wasn't very warm and it was somewhat wet, but that's ok. We had a fun and mostly relaxing weekend there.

And surprise surprise, I have a few plants growing in my garden!

our kiddos growing up

borthers

taking a bit too long of a walk for Kason and Ani

Kade helped nana pick wild flowers

having a serious conversation with dad

enjoying the boat ride

mom roasting the marshmallows while they're waiting patiently

me and Kason enjoying our treats

sunsets are the prettiest from this swing

the view from the swing

tiny cucumbers are coming out

I did not expect tomatoes this early with how cold it's been

I'm so excited our bell peppers seem to be going strong, unlike last year

the front of the house - not quite done. We need to find some plastic window
covers to put over the windows

the bed

2011-06-17T06:43:00.000-07:00

I think every couple has their little quirky things they like to argue about. Ehren and I can find agreement with most things fairly easily but somehow, our bed is an ongoing issue for us. And by that I mean the bed in a physical sense, in a sense of sleeping of course. :) You see, I grew up sleeping on a bed frame that my dad built which was sitting on the floor so I would lie just inches away from the floor. This is pretty normal in Europe and most of the beds they have are very low which is what I prefer. And then I married a man who comes from a country where most people prefer to fly in the air as they sleep, at least that's what it feels like when you finally climb up to the top of their beds. Needless to say, we both like completely different beds. Quite a few years ago I got my wish and we bought a low bed frame that I love, but Ehren doesn't love the fact that I don't want to use the box spring with our mattress on it. The reason is that when you add the box spring to our already very thick mattress it is way too high for the bed frame or my taste. So we argued about it for a while and recently Ehren decided to put the box spring on because he says it helps his back pain. I wasn't happy though because really, it is just way too high that way (don't get me started on how ugly it looks) and it just throws me every time I wake up, plus it is too soft for me that way too. Maybe we need a sleep number bed so we are both happy but in the meantime, I looked for one of those memory foam toppers to put on top of our mattress. It wasn't cheap but the reviews were very good so last night was the first night with the box spring finally gone and the new memory foam on the top. Neither of us felt like wow, this is awesome after the first night but at the same time we both slept really good. I love how you don't feel the other person moving around and how it's firm but soft at the same time. So that is our bed story and I really hope the topper will mean a happy and resolved bed conflict for us. :) I was trying to think of another silly example Ehren and I constantly don't see eye to eye on but I have to say this must be the only thing that usually comes back to haunt us. I'd love to hear what is something other couples argue about, I bet there would be a lot of funny examples. It is funny how we're all so different and how we need to blend our lives together when we get married, with all the good and bad, with all the fun and weird habits which we don't see as much in ourselves but we definitely see in our spouses. :) It's what makes life beautiful and interesting and I'm so glad God designed it this way so we have a helper and mate to share this life with. Even if his vision of a perfect bed is on the very opposite side of mine, I know that in the end whatever bed we have the best place to be is in his arms. And I have to say my favorite and cherished moments with Ehren are when we talk and talk (or cry or laugh) because one of us can't sleep until midnight or later, just lying in our bed. Happy 12th anniversary to my Ehren this Sunday and I hope we have many more years to argue about a bed together but mostly to see the gifts we are to each other every day.

a quick update

2011-06-15T20:32:00.000-07:00

I feel like I am living in a "blank" the last 3 weeks or so. Just trying to survive the kids, the neverending chores around the house, getting over 2 bad colds while trying to start running more, etc. I thought about writing on here a few times and then I realized that I don't have anything good or interesting to say. :) So it feels a bit like my life is pretty boring at the moment, no excitement other than watching kids get excited about playing with water outside, or popsicles they get to have, or watching Kade play soccer. The summer is sort of here, we had a couple days here and there that were pretty warm and we actually enjoyed some summer fun in our back yard. Since me and the kids are pretty stuck here in the house all day (there are too many kids to fit in our van) we've been going to town a lot in the evenings, like going to the park or Kade's soccer, or to the library which is a nice break. Other than that, nothing too much going on. We're hoping to enjoy some family time this weekend at Ehren's parents' cabin. It will be Father's Day and our anniversary on Sunday so we have 2 occasions to celebrate.

Here are a few pictures of the kids outside, our first warmer days and we hope for many many more this summer. :)

PS: In case you're wondering why in the world do we use the tiny kiddie pool instead of the big blow up one is that as a rule for a licensed daycare we have to change water in those pools every day and it is a pain in the butt to fill up the big pool and drain it all in one day. :) So our kids really can't wait to swim in the lake or the swimming pool on the weekends.

enjoying our slip n slide

how many bodies can we fit into this kiddie pool? :) They still had fun in there

Kason is the main entertainer in the water

now it's the babies' turn in the pool - a little play time after their nap

Carson and Aveah - my 2 babies who are officially not infants anymore

Still a few bottles a day but at least one of them will hold it until he's done.

happy eaters, sometimes

Life of a gardener

2011-05-28T19:24:00.000-07:00

Slowly, very slowly I am learning about being a gardener. Not a good one, of course, but little by little I am getting somewhere, hopefully. You have to know, I have the brownest thumb in the world and no plants survive inside our house. I kill them all, except this one orchid I got from Ehren because it just needs 3 ice cubes once a week and I can handle that. So to go from that to trying to do something outside our house is pretty brave of me. It was great when my mom was here because she absolutely loves everything about gardening and she would be out in the dirt all day every day if she could. So it was great for her to have the initiative to start up our place. I like working along side someone like that because I don't need to know much, I just watch and do what I'm told. But this year I am taking it in my hands and it is a new experience for me. Of course, Ehren has quite a big input in what we do and we have a few "discussions" about what should go where but in the end it is up to me what will be planted.

Since I know that I really dislike gardening and working with plants, bugs crawling over me and the mosquitoes biting while I'm doing it I do everything on a pretty small scale. My mom started a small vegetable garden in the tires last year and we had such great crops from that that I am doing that again. We added 3 more tires and a small area where I planted tomatoes, cucumbers, peppers, peas, radish and lettuce. I feel like it is better for me to go small and being able to handle it and mostly get ok results as trying to do a huge garden and get hardly anything because it is overwhelming and I wouldn't have time for it anyway.

So today was our gardening day and I can't believe how much work we got done in just one day. We fixed up the corner in front of our house with some edging material, rearranged some of the plants in there and weeded the whole area. Now we just need to put down the wood chips on top and for this year we're done with the corner. I know it could look prettier with more variety of plants but it is fine for now. We still have to do the whole right side in front of the house the same way, with a couple bushes or something to make it look nicer. A sidewalk would be very nice too but we might wait for a good deal on some stepping stones or something. Besides that corner I managed to plant almost all my vegetables. I was really happy about all that being done and I so should have known something was going to happen. A very quick and big storm was coming through just after we got done with everything and put stuff away in the garage. Here is me thinking inside, this will be great for all my plants, some nice rain is just what they need. That is until the rain came. It started pouring and pouring harder and pretty soon it wasn't just pouring out but pea-size hail was falling everywhere. On my plants! I was just watching out the kitchen window in disbelief, watching the ground getting whiter and whiter. Finally the storm passed and I rushed out the door to check on my poor plants. I am thinking at this point, maybe I am getting to be a bit of a gardener, thinking of my plants as my kids or something. :) The tomato, pepper and cucumber plants look ok but the tiny lettuce is all gone. We have to wait and see how they do and I am just hoping I don't have to replace too many of them. But I guess that is the life of a gardener or a farmer. You never know what the weather will bring and you just have to embrace it for what it is and start over. Yes, start over.

To be honest though, I sure am thankful that our family doesn't depend on the food from our crops. This way if "stuff" happens we move on. It doesn't affect us much, other than our mood I think or I should say my mood. "All that work, time put in it and money to buy everything and it is all for nothing" is something I would be thinking and just getting mad at the situation. But really, there is so much more to it than the end result of the vegetable or fruit garden. There is the family time spent taking care of it, teaching children about how the plants grow and how we take care of them, just being outside together and taking care of what God gave us. So I will try to be thankful for this day despite the hail ending of it and know that tomorrow is a whole new day and a new day to be able to garden or do whatever. "This is the day that the God has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it" came to mind for some reason. :)

Hope you've had a blessed day wherever you are.

there are my tires

digging in the dirt and loving my new gardening gloves

the corner I wrote about, it still needs to be covered with the wood shavings

lettuce, peas, cucumber and carrots in the little dirt spot

I like it that I can weed while the kids are playing on the swing set

tomatoes, cucumbers and bell peppers

only the red flowers survived the hail. Will have to expand this corner a bit

we are very excited to see the green grass after having dirt lawn for so long.
It will need a lot of weeding but it's coming in nicely.

and the wood chips are done too.
Now the next job is doing this on the right side of the front door.

smoothies and shakes

2011-05-24T08:31:00.000-07:00

The summer has kind of started (depending on the day) and so have our favorite summer treats. All our kids and daycare kids love when I make smoothies and can't get enough of them, even one picky eater who normally doesn't like most fruits. So it is usually our morning or afternoon snack on a warm day. The other kind of drink they love is a "strawberry shake" and it is pretty much strawberry milk made in a new and yummy way. Here is my recipes if you want to give it a try. It is nice to have a good sturdy blender to make these though.

Yogurt smoothie:
- 6 oz yogurt, flavored
- plain yogurt to add
- 1 banana
- handful of any frozen fruit
- any extra fresh fruit you have (haven't tried apples though)
- a big handful of spinach leaves
- fruit juice

Put all the ingredients into the blender and keep adding fruit juice until it is the right consistency. I like mine pretty thick. Your kids will not have any idea that spinach is in it because you can't taste it at all. If you want to make it healthier skip the flavored yogurt and use only the plain one but it is not very sweet then and some kids may not like it that way.

Our strawberry milkshake:
- milk
- Nestle instant Strawberry powder ( it is a lot healthier choice than the syrups)
- ice cubes
- handful of frozen strawberries

Pour milk into the blender, add a couple spoons of the powder and ice. Blend well and taste to see if it is sweet enough. You don't want it to be bright pink or else it will be too sweet. But I do add more powder as I keep blending because I usually put too little at first. You can skip the frozen strawberries but if I have them I put them in because it makes it a little better.

Serve in big glasses with straws and enjoy!

strawberry-banana-blackberry-kiwi smoothie

Kason is 3

2011-05-16T05:50:00.000-07:00

Kason turned 3 while me and Ani were in Slovakia so we celebrated his birthday with the family this weekend. He was so excited to have a party for him and a birthday cake. It is a bit sad to see our baby growing up, we are for sure beyond the infant/toddler stage at our house now. Kason is becoming such a fun, loving little boy. He is talking more and more and you can reason with him most of the time (unless it is his birthday and other kids want to play with his new toys). He still loves to be held, Ehren said he wasn't like that much while I was gone but now he is back to wanting to cuddle with me and Ehren. Kason is also very curious about life, wants to know what is going on and wants to know names of everything and he won't stop asking what something is until I tell him. I think that is how he learned the names of all those shapes so quick because he wants to know the names for things. :) One cute thing he does is that when he meets a new person he comes right up and says "I am Kason Martin Hanson and this is my friend so and so." He is definitely the least shy of our kids and is not afraid to come up to anybody. He is just fun to watch especially now that I've been away from him for almost 3 weeks. He and Ani missed each other a lot because they are pretty good playing buddies so it is cute to see them play together again. But really all 3 of them have been having a great time together this weekend, our family is all together again.

I made a monster truck birthday cake for Kason and he was very excited about it but mostly he couldn't wait to blow off his candles. Ehren's parents, great aunt and brother's family came to celebrate the occasion with us and it was great to see them all after a while.

Kason's new haircut

the family

monster truck cake

Kason watching the cake and getting ready to blow

Ani and Emily enjoying the cake

all those presents

he got a new train an was very excited about it

and he got a truck for outside from nana and papa

The Long Way Home

2011-05-15T12:11:00.000-07:00

I just had to write about our eventful way home because it is all pretty funny now in retrospect. You would totally think I am flying for the first time and being a mom for the first time. First, our Ani still has potty accidents at night so we usually put a diaper on but she never has an accident during the day. I know I should probably bring her in to see if it is something to be concerned about, it's like if she is in deep sleep she doesn't wake up for having to go to the bathroom.

Anyway, on the way to Slovakia she only slept about 2 hours the whole time and so she never got to sleep so hard that she would have an accident. I thought about putting a diaper on for the way home but for some reason I didn't. I had plenty of extra clothes and stuff in my carry on bag, which was confiscated in Budapest saying it is too heavy to take on the plane and I had to check it in. I was quick trying to figure out what one or 2 things I could take out of there that we would need for the trip but then I just couldn't think straight on the spot like that and didn't think of some extra clothes. Our first airplane ride was great and uneventful and we were soon getting on our "big" plane, that was flying from Munich to Chicago and the whole flight took about 9 hours. We had to get up early again that day to get to the airport in time so Ani was pretty tired and soon after take off she was fast asleep. After almost an hour into her nap, as I am trying to catch 20 minutes of snooze here and there, I notice a certain smell. For a while I didn't think anything of it and then it hit me - Anika. I quick feel her butt and just as I thought that certain smell was Anika having an accident. Not only her underwear and pants were soaked but her sweatshirt and the seat she was on. If we didn't go 10 times to the bathroom before we got on the plane, but "come on" I thought. My mind started racing what in the world can I do, stranded on this huge plane with absolutely nothing to change Ani into. I quick started looking through the plane to hopefully see a mom with a child about Ani's age but I only knew of 2 or 3 moms with little babies. There was no hope. :) I wrapped her mid section into 2 blankets that they gave us for the trip and took her to the bathroom. Poor Ani wanted to sleep so bad and when she found out she was all wet she felt really bad. So that was all within the first hour of the 9 hour plane ride. I asked a flight attendant if they had anything I could use but she just laughed at me. So the only option was to grab as many paper towels as I could get in the bathroom and stick it all around Ani's belly, under her pants. I still wrapped her in those blankets and that's how she sat for the rest of the time. We still got up about 5 times to go to the bathroom and I was relieved that by the end she was almost totally dry and the smell was not as noticeable unless you smelled her by her clothes. :)

I was relieved about it again when we entered the Chicago airport because somehow too many planes landed at the same time or something but the customs were packed with people and we waited a couple hours in an overcrowded hallway to wait out turn. Anika was so tired at this point as it was getting close to the middle of the night in Slovakia and she just sat on the ground and either walked when we moved or just scooted on the ground. I didn't even care anymore, I myself was almost too tired to stand up and I couldn't hold her in my arms. Well, we finally got our turn and I have never been more excited to get our bags to go through customs because I could finally get a diaper and change of clothes for Ani. Of course, if I was smart I would have taken a bit more stuff out of that bag as we had to stay in Chicago overnight, which I didn't know about at that time.

That is my dumb moment number 2. So I have my boarding pass all ready to fly from Chicago to Fargo, our final destination and I was so happy we had enough time to get to our plane because most people flying with us missed their connecting flights because of the customs situation. Anyway, there were no boards with flight info, just a train to get on and I ask a lady by the train where I should go. She asked what airlines and I said United to which she points me to the train and said I needed to go there. We got off at a terminal with a big board of flight info there and I check for Fargo - 8:15, just like my boarding pass so all I had to find was a gate number. I got it and we slowly got to our gate, even had something to eat and waited. If I was thinking a little bit it would dawn on me to check the flight number but it wouldn't occur to me in a million years that there are 2 small planes leaving from Chicago to Fargo within a few minutes of each other. So I just waited until it was time to get on the plane and that's when the flight attendant goes "you are flying United and this is American airlines". I just about died right there. I could not believe that I was just sitting there for an hour and did not realize I am waiting for a wrong plane. Of course, our terminal was at the other side of the airport and so it was impossible for us to make it in time for boarding since these 2 planes were leaving at the same time. Seriously, there are so few flights coming into Fargo in one day so why are there 2 from Chicago at the same time? I was so furious, at myself and everyone, I knew the best option we would have now is to fly in the morning.

And that is what happened. Luckily the airline didn't charge me for re-booking and gave us a half off coupon for a very nice hotel so that was great. I called Ehren's mom and then Ehren and of course I just bawled because all I wanted was to get home. I was exhausted, sweaty, with no change of clothes and no one I knew. Unfortunately Ehren was already in Fargo so he drove out there with the boys for nothing and I felt so bad about that. But I guess the main thing is that we were safe and nothing bad happened. I put Anika into a nice hotel bed after 10pm and she was out within 2 minutes. The next morning we woke up early to get to the airport and got on the first plane to Fargo and it was so sweet to see our boys again. Kason seemed so much bigger to me and we all had a great time catching up. The kids still play and play together so nice, you can tell they all missed each other.

So that is the story of my trip back. Pretty dumb and sad, after flying that many times to do this, but I guess stuff happens to everybody. I am glad I am home safe and sound. We are getting ready for Kason's family birthday party tonight so no time to sit back and relax yet.

Pictures

2011-05-10T13:00:00.000-07:00

I thought I would have more time to write but we are down to the wire now, trying to do everything with everyone so I have no time for blogging but at least I want to put the pictures up of our days or else it will be too many at once.

Yesterday afternoon we went to my birth town Levice where my mom"s mom and my only living grandma lives among other relatives. We visited with my grandma for a bit and then spent the rest of the afternoon/evening with my 2 aunts and that was so fun, just like the old times. Anika even learned how to fall asleep in the car now with all these trips here and there and now she keeps asking if she should be sleeping when we get in a car. On our drive home my parents and I were remembering the old times when we were little and they used to take us on trips. There were no radios, dvds or anything so the way dad had to entertain us the whole time was by singing to us all the fun folk and Christian songs and we had so much fun listening to those. Us kids all had our favorite songs that we couldn"t wait to hear and tried to sing along with dad. That is one of the best childhood memories of mine and I hope we can pass on something as precious to our children one day.

Today - Tuesday - we had a full day visiting with my old class mates from elementary and high school and it was really nice to see them again and their lovely children. It is so nice to see friends as moms now, going through the same things as me even though they are thousands of miles away.

at one of my aunt"s cabin - built in 16th century

inside their living room

a gothic church there, from the 13th century

beautiful country side and such good fresh air

with my grandma - 4 generations

my aunt just loved Anika

we went out for pizza

Ani was SO excited to finally get her dreamy sunday because they sell ice cream on every corner here. But she was waiting for it very patiently, never once tried to beg for it

3 sisters with their mom and Ani

eating at my aunt"s house before heading home (my cousin David is on my left)

meeting some class mates

my elementary school class mate who now lives in NY

Ani taking a picture - me and my friends as moms

meeting with other friends in town - it was a hot day so the kids
loved all the fountains everywhere

in front of the presidential palace

trying to get a castle background

finally found the American hockey player - in front of the American Embassy, duh

There are just friends with whom no matter how much time passes by you
just pick up right where you left off, as if it were only days and these are friends like that - for life

all of our kids together

Ani was in heaven that she got to walk this great dog on her own for hours

again trying to get the castle but the lighting didn"t work out the best

By the end Ani was having a blast with the kids